Insightful Retrospectives

I'm Back!

2007-04-21T17:31:00.000-04:00

Yes, my trip to New Zealand was cut short due to lack of work/funds. I'm back in Canada trying to figure out what I'm going to do next. I think the possibility of attending UNB to continue my journey toward becoming a professor could be on, but under what conditions I'm not yet sure.

Though it was disappointing not to have stayed the full year in NZ, I'm not heartbroken over it. I quickly learned it wasn't a place that I wanted to live forever - not exactly sure why, but maybe it'll become clear with more reflection. I would have liked to see out the year, however. I ran into a few brick walls that limited my job opportunities, some that I didn't predict, and some old foes of mine. Without going too deeply into it, or the stories of frustration, some of the vibes I got from employers and agencies fell into the following categories:

1. Overqualified. Applying to work in a warehouse, store, or even some administration role (including one sports admin job I'm still bitter over!) with my two degrees seemed to have some people feel I was 'over-qualified' for their jobs. If I thought I was overqualified, would I be applying? No, probably not.

2. Limited time. That I was leaving in 10 months surely kept me out of jobs where people were looking for a long term employee.

3. Not qualified enough. I applied to some school librarian jobs, without success, but I feel they were looking for someone with more experience and/or with IT qualifications. I also applied for a dream job of promoting sports in school for the district of Waikato. I think a combo of lack of official accredation (ie. sports diploma, etc.) and that I was only staying for the year might have kept me out of the running - and maybe lots of competition.

Combined with getting the impression that coaching rugby was going to be more of a headache than fun (yes, I was head coach of Waikato University women, but there were less than 10 people on my interested player list three weeks before the first game!), I decided that it was time to leave Hamilton and get back on the road. So I went up to Whakatane, Tauranga, and Northland to stay with a couple of families and take in more of NZ's lovely scenery and culture. I have a few more stories to tell, but I think that's better done with photos at a later date.

All-in-all, my New Zealand experience was a good one and I don't regret it one bit. My one big lament is that I didn't get to Samoa, but I figure it'll always be there, so I can leave it open for a future journey. But for now I'm ready to settle down for a while and actually start heading toward a career or at least something long-term.

I had to laugh while listening to 'GO!' today on CBC radio. They were talking about people in their late 20s and early 30s living with parents, high education and little career prospects. Sounded familiar. :) Though I, too, fit into this category, I also had to laugh at being labelled a 'Boomerang' - ie. the child of a Baby Boomer who has come back home to live and ponder a future.

... that quest begins, for real this time, now.

More things you might not have known about New Zealand . . .

2007-03-05T16:12:00.000-05:00

8. Conveniently, the price listed on a product is what it actually costs! The 12.5% tax is already factored into it and you don’t have to do any complicated math to figure out how much you’ll be paying at the register. Because they have also phased out the penny and five cent coins, that price is also rounded up or down to the nearest 10th of a dollar. Maybe one day we’ll be intelligent enough to adopt this.

9. Water pressure is much higher here. I’ve been sprayed several times by the taps in public washrooms – I swear! And one could possible use a toilet as a bidet if one chose to do so. I’m sure many an innocent male has been accused of ‘missing the target’ given that a toilet wash often splashes up on the seat.

10. Mail is delivered to your driveway mailbox by mail ‘posties’ on bicycles!

11. There is only one native land mammal – a kind of bat. The balance of mammals in New Zealand were introduced by early settlers. There are even rumours that there are a few surviving moose in the south, which had been introduced decades ago from Canada, but were thought to have died quite quickly. Sightings are about as frequent and inconclusive as Big Foot.

12. Like Brits, most police do not carry guns. They also drive geeky looking cars with massive white and neon yellow/orange checker patterns on both sides.

13. Like Canadians, they have a healthy dislike for their bigger, more popular neighbours. Aussies are looked upon for all their negative aspects from ‘stealing’ cultural icons like Crowded House to being intolerant of other cultures, like last year’s aggressiveness to Lebanese in Cronulla – no matter how much myth is involved. Beating them at anything is cause for national celebration.

14. As far as I can see, there isn’t really a hunting season. Both red deer and possum are over-populated and one can easily set up a hunting tour to go bag a few. It’s also easy to go ocean fishing where limits are nowhere near that of inland lakes and rivers.

15. Maori animal and geographic names are very common. If you pay close enough attention, you’ll notice that the Maori language uses quite a lot of the five vowels, but just eight consonants (h, k, m, n, p, r, t, w), and two digraphs, ‘ng’ as in ‘ngati’ (n-ga-tee) and ‘wh’, which makes and ‘f’ sound, as in Whakatane (faka-tan-eh).

16. I’m still learning proper Maori pronunciation, but have dropped saying ‘Mao-ri’ for the more correct ‘Maao-rri’ – with a long ‘a’ and a rolled ‘r’. You also don’t pronounce a hard ‘g’ so Rangi (meaning ‘sky’ and a common name) is not ‘ran-gi’ but ‘rang-ee’. Where Island words are concerned, it’s quite easy to read if you break down the syllables, but there are some points to trip you up. In Samoan, a ‘g’ seems to involve saying ‘ng’ instead, so former All Black Captain Tana Umaga’s name should be said as ‘U-mang-a’. In Fijian, ‘c’ seems to make a ‘th’ sound, so Blues player Isa Nacewa’s name is pronounced ‘Na-theh-wa.’

17. Tattoos are more visable in New Zealand, especially on women’s arms and especially those in Maori motifs.

18. It’s okay for a guy to sport a mullet and wear short shorts. If you look at the All Blacks, there are a few examples of what I call the ‘fashionable mullet.’

19. Many bands and actors you think are Aussie are actually Kiwi, and Kiwis resent the misrepresentation.

20. Their most popular cereal, Weet-bix, is a flakey bale of vitamin-infused carbs that made by former sanatarium-running Seventh Day Aventists. (The company itself is called Sanatarium.)

21. You actually have to pay to use the internet and ‘borrow’ cds/movies from most libraries.

22. Healthcare is just ‘mostly free’ as opposed to the ‘universally free’ we enjoy. If you go to emergency you won’t have to pay, and if you’re ‘lucky’ enough to have a serious injury you won’t have to wait hours. A trip to your GP will cost you.

23. Right now ‘emo’ bands are the rage with all the kids – crap like My Chemical Romance, etc. I’m pretty sure this isn’t called ‘emo’ back home, as my impression of it are sad guys in vintage clothes with mop-top hairdos and black framed glasses.

I hate job hunting!

2007-02-27T15:36:00.000-05:00

This weekend I'll have spent a month in Hamilton. As of yet, my job hunt has resulted in two rejection letters. :( Two of the things that seem to hurt me are being 'overqualified' and being seen as a tourist, though I stress in my application that I intend to settle here for the year.

I think, if I hadn't neglected to check my email, I'd be working at Te Aute College right now as they had to go with someone by the day I actually managed to check it. (And stupid me hadn't left them a phone number where they could reach me.) After talking with them, they were still very interested in me and wanted me to re-apply when their new dorm opens midway through the year.

Though I've had many unsuccessful tries at finding a job here, I might just have found something to keep me here and put a decent amount of money in my pocket. The only hitch is that I have to wait a week until the man who will ultimately decide gets back into town. Essentially the local rugby union is hiring two admin people to help clubs maintain their books, correspondence, paperwork, etc as a bit of a pilot project to up the standard and see if it's a worthwhile investment into clubs. (Yes, club management can be as useless here as it is back home.) Given my five years of being in charge of my own clubs, dilligently doing all the management myself, I feel I'm a lock for this position. So my hopes are up and my fingers are crossed - though I'm not spending my money frivolously just yet. . . . I managed to buy a Specialized mountain bike for $30 at an auction last week, but it needs some repairs before I can ride it. (And Sue will be happy to know that EVERYONE MUST wear a helmet in New Zealand, so I'll have to buy one of those as well.)

But if things don't work out, I'll be back on the road doing some more farming stuff - and I already have some offers in Bay of Plenty and Northland - but it'll be sad to have to give up the rugby. As it stands, it looks like I'll be the head coach (probably only) of the Waikato University women's team. We have our first meeting on Thursday, so I'll learn more then. I'm pretty excited, though, as there are some very big, athletic Islanders and Maori at this school so it could be interesting to see what's on offer. And as I also plan on heading to Samoa before I get back to Canada, I hope to make some friends who can teach me more about the Island culture and maybe even hook me up with some family to stay with when I visit!

So that's all that's happened in my life thusfar. It's been pretty slow just hunting for jobs. I did get to a Chiefs game, but they suck this year so I don't think I'll become a regular (though their stadium is about a 10 min walk from my house). All the best, and until next time . . .

Things you might not have known about New Zealand.

2007-02-15T15:35:00.000-05:00

I haven't had any significant changes from the last post. I've settled into a town called Hamilton, one of the biggest, in fact, though just over 100 000 inhabitants. It's about an hour and a half drive south of Auckland, in dairy farming country (though it's still quite hilly). I figure in a town this size, it should be relatively easy to find a job - currently praying I'll get selected for my dream job of Sport Facilitator with the Sport Waikato organization. Wish me luck! Oh, and I've joined the University of Waikato RFC as women's coach and youth development coach . . . and they're actually going to pay me! Woo hoo!

But to keep you all amused, I've come up with this little list of things I've noticed and found interesting about New Zealand thusfar.

1. There are a lot of tourists here, so much so that it's been hard to pick out what's a true Kiwi accent and who are Aussies/English, etc. with little twinges of Kiwi. I also seem to run into Germans everywhere. Be afraid!

2. Kiwis ain't as "green" as the world thinks. Many rural people have garbage pits in their yards where the rubbish (including recyclable materials!) are burned and buried.

3. They say 'Eh' as much as, and some more than, Canadians do! Some people even say 'Eh' in response to an unheard question. Even WE don't do that!

4. Despite the ability of the Black Ferns (national women's rugby team, if you didn't know), there aren't many women's club sides and very little high school rugby for girls. I'm told our women's team might be in a 10-a-side league this year because there just aren't the interested numbers required to play 15s. Canada rules in this area, but we need better coaches to bring our women along. (Touch rugby - the kind where you have to retreat on defence - is the key, I feel. It's played in the summer by many men and women alike.)

5. Many people leave their front doors open all day to let the air in. They don't have screen doors or windows as we have, so flies are a constant inside the house. At least they don't bite, and there aren't many 'mozzies.'

6. In houses, toilets are often in a separate room (quite small) than the shower/bath/basin. It being adjacent isn't such a bad idea thinking of how long, and how destructive, dad can be.

7. Little kids often go around barefoot downtown and at school. You seen many people barefoot in public stores and buildings as well - I love it!

. . . more as I discover them.

I'm Heeeeerrrrre!

2007-01-29T19:41:00.000-05:00

First thing's first. I never want to fly again! Dave asked if I'll be swimming back, but someone from the New Zealand tourist board has sent me info on taking a freighter from Tauranga to Vancouver, where I could hop the train . . . not too shabby, eh? More on that, hopefully later than sooner. I have a job interview with an all-Maori boys school tomorrow, so I might end up staying the year after-all.

Anyway, back to the flights. Our beloved Air Canada made us late to LA because of 'security checks' which meant a good number of us missed our connection to Fiji and had to stay the night. What took place over the next day was akin to what seems to go on all the time on the TLC program 'Airline.' Air Canada didn't totally see it as their fault so only gave us a discount at one of LAX's expensive airports, and the next day, we discovered that our connecting airline, Air Pacific, charged us an $85 penalty for changing our booking - yes, they saw us being late as a 'change.' Anyway, it was nice at least to have a few people in the same boat and we all leaned on each other for support. The 10 hour flight from LA to Fiji was hell. I was cramped, couldn't sleep, was jolted left, right, up and down by turbulence, and ended up being quite sick for the next week due to something I picked up en route. I don't care if a freighter will take two weeks to cross the Pacific. I've found the price is about the same as a flight, meals and fees included, but at least I'll have the freedom to move about as I please. (Apparently they even have a tv room, fitness room, pool, games room! Swank!)

The bus trip from Auckland to Wellington was forgettable, esp. given it was at night, but the ferry across the Cook Strait to the South Island was quite nice. The scenery in the Marlborough region, known for wine, pine, and fishing, was quite lovely as well. I spent the night in a small town called Havelock, at a very nice hostel with a great host. Unfortunately that was the last nice hostel I stayed at! The next day, I caught a 'mail boat' to visit my first farm, called Port Ligar, and owned by the Shand family. The mail boat trip was great. Essentially, the farms on the Marlborough Sounds are so isolated that their mail has to be delivered by boat. I was surprised to learn that it's a free service for the families, and it is tourists like me who - three times a week - travel the boat so much that Mr. and Mrs. Evans (the skippers) can provide the service and live off it. It was one of the many things I have come to see in New Zealand thusfar that has shown me they are as kind and accommodating people as they say.

The skipper of the mailboat, upon learning I was going to stay with the Shands, assured me they took good care of their WWOOFers (willing worker on organic farms), but also mentioned they were 'a bit religious', which got me wondering. I really didn't know what to expect. I did make a strong effort to check my swearing. :) The most religion I witnessed was the saying of grace at every meal which holding of hands. Like at school last year, though I don't practice any recognized faith, it was cool to see how others observe theirs and participate in it. It seems to me that people are a bit more religious than your average Canadian down here, especially the people from the Islands.

Tim and Raewyn Shand run a sheep and mussel farm, supplementing it with a couple of fishing lodges that can be rented out. I can see why they get a fair amount of customers, despite the isolation of their farm, because the area is so beautiful and the fishing was so good! Friends and wwoofers seem to come and go, with there always being the offer of food and a place to stay. They also have ten kids, only the younger ones being around home most days, but I kind of thought their life was a bit like it must have been for my great grandmother, who was one of 13 kids in a farming family.

Although it kind of reminded me of Muskoka with it's many lakes, pine trees, and hills, I had to keep reminding myself that they live on salt water of the Cook Strait, which is between the north and south islands that is New Zealand. As such, we didn't have to fish so much by rod (my one trip trolling came up with nothing) because you could just set up a net and catch a boat load of fish. I didn't quite catch what legal limits were, but the boys must have brought in 30 fish the day after setting the net and we ate like kings! The day after I went scallop dredging with family friend Julian, and farm hand Graham - who was an interesting character, having been a Christian missionary in many parts of the world and now living on the Shand's property. I found the hospitality of the Shands and their friends incredible. Though we sometimes worked long days, the work (milling lumber for their new wharf from trees Graham cut down, and one day of fixing new floaters to the mussel lines) was pretty easy. Getting rides up the steep hills on the ute (ie. truck/suv) or tractor saved me a lot of huffing and puffing! The weather was so nice that it was good to be out enjoying it. I love how summer doesn't go above 30 degrees and there's not that much humidity! In the end, it was one of those situations that you run into when you do any sort of manual labour, as I have in the past around home, looking back at what you've accomplished, gaining pride in doing good honest work.

Given the financial setbacks I had in LA, I realized that I needed to get moving on the job hunt as I figured at the rate I was spending I'd be on my way home late February. Raewyn was kind enough to drive me to Nelson where I could catch a bus back to Picton and a ferry to Wellington. The two hour drive seemed to fly by as we talked about all sorts of things pertaining to New Zealand life, while I took in more of the lovely scenery and joined her in cursing the crazy drivers along the single lane cliffside road. (Pictures to follow when I fill up my card and have it put on cd.) Nelson, a major NZ tourist trap, was a quick in and out overnighter for me, and where I learned how much I don't fit into the backpacker hostel life. The noise and late nights most of these people have is definitely not what I want out of my trip. I wanted to meet real New Zealanders and take part in what it's really like to be a Kiwi - not find a naked person (I scooted out as quickly as I sighted him/her) on the couch in a hostel tv lounge!

I had another great trip across the strait, talking with an elderly Englishman about rugby, footy, and travel the whole way, and decided to avoid another hostel in Wellington to catch a bus up to Palmerston North to plan my next trip. Unfortunately, I had to book a hotel room as I was getting in a bit late, but found a cheaper (quiet!) hostel the next day. Unfortunately, someone nicked the bag of plums I had bought in Nelson, and stored in the fridge. I'm still a bit miffed at that one! I saw the mecca that was the New Zealand Rugby Museum in 'Palmy', which was a bit smaller than I thought, but was filled with all sorts of great artifacts from the last hundred years. I was a bit of a hit with the two volunteers, which included an old man who had many appearances for Wellington province in his day, as a Canuck who really knew his rugby! (Didn't you just know I'd be a hit down here! ;)

. . . and that brings us to now. I took a bus to Taupo yesterday, another NZ resort town on the country's largest lake (of the same name), where I'm staying with Nick and Bec Simmons - a transplanted English family - on their cattle farm. Like the Shand's they're great hosts and feed me very well. :)

I'm lucky to have an interview over the phone with Te Aute College tomorrow, a school for Maori boys, doing a job similar to that which I had at Ashbury. I thought I was out of the running as of the 19th, with no word at that aforementioned deadline. But when I checked my email on the 26th, I discovered that they did want to speak with me - but that message was sent on the 21st. Feeling I was out of the running, I sent them an explanation and apology. Last night, I got a reply saying their deadline has now been extended - which is getting a bit close as school starts next Wednesday! I reckon that's a good sign for me, as they might actually like what this Canuck has to offer and they really want me as an option. If I don't luck out there, though, one of my on-line rugby chat friends works for a staffing firm in Hamilton, NZ, and after we had a brief chat on the phone the other day, has offered to start searching for something I could do up there. So there's a good chance I won't have to come home too soon! :)

With that possibility in mind, though, and having blown past some of New Zealand's tourist traps, I had to really think about what I want to get out of this trip. First and foremost, I want to be part of a rugby club and learn as much as I can. I need a job to last the season, so hope whatever I end up doing will be somewhat relevant to what I want to do with my life. I also want to get a taste of traditional Maori culture, having heard a story from someone who used to come into work who had been invited to a Maori wedding while travelling! But I really can't be bothered to see all the 'touristy' things. Helping out people on their farms, in exchange for food and a place to sleep, is so far allowing me to see all there is to see in terms of nature, and I don't have to follow around a bunch of obnoxious backpackers to do it! :)

Anyway, more in a week or so and hopefully I'll have some pictures ready by then. Take care, all, and keep in touch!

Regrets?

2007-01-12T14:34:00.000-05:00

Whilst driving to Ottawa last Saturday, on a trip to see as many of my friends as I could for embarking on my long-talked-about journey to New Zealand, I had to laugh at the appropriateness of the theme for 'DNTO' on CBC Radio.

Regrets

I'm about to start my furthest journey to date, one where I'm well prepared to stay longer than my 'Working Holiday Visa' if the opportunity should arise, and I can't say I have any regrets about getting to this point.

If you had asked me if I had any about my life this time in 2003, I think I'd be singing a different tune. I had just graduated and was desperately trying to find my first teaching post. I'll spare you the sorry details as to why I didn't get one, as they are still a bit frustrating to think about, but it really hit me last weekend that I wouldn't be where I am now if those plans HAD come to fruition.

That autumn of 2003, I moved back to Ottawa - where I had attended Carleton for a BA and U d'O for a BEd. I was lucky to become the head of women's rugby at Carleton, despite only applying as 'an assitant.' I moved back into 454 Riverdale with my good mate Dave, and the rugby was going well, but I spent the next four months unemployed, looking for work almost daily - something I've become quite good at, sadly. :(

That winter, I managed to get two jobs: one at Dovercourt Rec, and another at Elgin Sports. Both paid not very much, but they were almost entirely free of stress, came with good perks, and allowed me to develop some new skills. I also thoroughly enjoyed my bicycle commutes, and losing somewhere around 60-80 lbs in the process. (Unfortunately I put some back on last year because of Ashbury's wonderful free meals, but did manage to add a lot of muscle that I had lost in the first weight loss achievement.)

Those jobs gave me enough funds to take my first journey to England in January 2005, where I lived in Bristol for almost six months. I had great rugby experiences, but not so much in the teaching category, so decided to leave. (However, I hope to one day return as I really do think I fit into rural/small town UK life.)

I came back to Ottawa and forged deeper friendships with old university and hometown friends, not to mention new ones through rugby and the reliable 'friend of a friend' network. It's those friendships I count as the best part of having not found a job in my hometown back in 2002. The rugby got better as I spent time under the wing of a national coach and dear friend. The Carleton women also had their best run - ever - and we took our show on the road, for some memorable tours.

That fall, I managed to get a great job at an assistant housemaster at Ashbury College. I was reponsible for the boys house, worked as a supply teacher, and helped out with several teams. I finally found a 'teaching' role I was happy in, as I was able to interact with the kids on a variety of levels and didn't have the stress and workload of a fulltime teacher. I was also lucky enough to meet some wonderful people within the staff and go on two mini tours with rugby, one where I finally won some silverware as a coach!!! :) The job also allowed me to improve my skills as a disciplinarian and reflect on how I'd really like to fit within the education field. I also managed to save enough money to make this forthcoming journey to New Zealand.

Which brings us to now. On DNTO, Sook-yin commented that 'If only...' are the two saddest words in the English language. I can't help but agree. When I think about it, though it did suck for a while not getting a 'dream job' at the school I loved so much and that actually made me who I am today, I have absolutely no regrets about how things have unfolded since then. I think of the experiences I've had, and am about to have, and all the wonderful friends I made in that time, and I can't help but think that Fate prevented me from bogging myself down in my hometown. Funny how things play out, eh?

- - - - - - - -

Stay tuned to this site as I'll be updating it as often as I can while I'm in NZ. I'll also be sending a link to my photobucket site where you can see all the pictures I'll take. Unfortunately, my Pentax just died, so I'll be leaving it behind and have to rely on my little Canon digital. :( Anyway, thanks for everything these last few years. I've decided that I want to return to school and pursue my dream of becoming a professor/author, and hope to do a cross country train trip on arrival, so I could be chugging into your town sooner than you think. :)

Favourite Sporting Moments

2006-12-10T23:21:00.000-05:00

In no particular order of importance ...

1. First season of rugby 1997, making it to the league finals with my U19 club; starting tighthead. (Though losing the final is also one of the worst. Both teams dominated the league that year, winning most games by 20-30 points. Our meeting in the league was a tight affair. We played the first half with 13 players, bumped up to 15 by two of our U17s late in the second. They had a dirty prop who our centre 'took out', our captain bloodied theirs, there were several punchups, the final one forcing the ref to call the game with no more than five mins. left and us trailing by less than 5. We lost the final as their scrum half sniped around a ruck in the dying minutes.)

2. Slotting my first UK convert in 2005. My team saw me warming up (while they were in the pub) and decided to give me a go. I hit our only convert from the 15m hash on the right (wrong side for a right footer), 25m back. The opposition were so impressed to see a guy with a '3' on his back hit slot it dead centre, I got a round of applause from them as well as my team. (For you Irish/Aussies, I even took off my scrum cap, a la Humphreys/Giteau!)

3. Making a huge hit on a prop bigger than me whilst in high school. We were defending the goal line and they did one of those penalty taps to their biggest guy. I seemed to be the only one charging on the tap and squared up to him perfectly ... he just seemed to crumple and even spilled the ball.

4. While playing gridiron in my last year of school, having had four good years with two coaches who were (and are) like fathers to me, making a huge block that made a kid literally fly backwards. At half, one coach pulled me and two mates aside to give one of those talks you later realize was contrived and meant to light a fire under you (which I still can't do well as a coach!). He told us he was disappointed in our play, etc. etc. and after making this huge hit, I pointed over to him and yelled 'that's for you!' ... he was beaming. It was great.

5. ... anytime I make a line break in Touch. People never assume someone as chubby as me can be as quick as I am. I can step off either foot and even have some other tricks I can't describe (ie. The Shimmy ). I don't have pace, but usually feck up the defence enough to find my support runners and put them away for tries. (... and why I've become really serious about cardio and losing weight, so I can actually play 2nd5 as opposed to 'short, thinning prop')

My coaching ones will probably cause me to well up ... I miss the uni women's team and hometown club lads a lot. There are too many 'favourite' memories to list - good and bad!

You're a CBC Radio junkie if . . .

2006-11-25T21:53:00.000-05:00

1. You've ever listened to Radio Two. (that alone can qualify you)

2. You know what Anton Szabo does.

3. You know what 'Sad Goat' refers to.

4. You subscribe to satellite radio just to hear Jay and Chris on Radio Three.

5. You enjoy listening to Ed Lawrence, the garden guy on the noon phone-in, eventhough you don't have a garden or even a house plant.

6. You know that in between 1am and 6am, there is international radio content played, primarily from Australia, Germany, Sweden, the Netherlands, sometimes from Russia, South Africa, and the Czech Republic.

7. You were pround of Sook-yin Lee's participation in the 'art porn' film Shortbus, citing it a step forward in Canada's embrace with all forms of culture - and you can't wait to see her in it!

8. You think God Himself must sound like Peter Gzowski, or possibly Alan Maitland.

9. You thought Air Farce was better on the radio, and you knew that Double Exposure wouldn't make it on television.

10. You know that if you miss a show, you can tune into CBC on the net and catch it in a different time zone.

11. You were heart broken when Radio3.com was 'revamped' and you just don't feel the same about the new site.

12. You know that, deep down, Dave and Morley are only figments of Stuart MacLean's imagination, but you wish they were real.

13. You know what 'Groove Shinny' is, and have actually tried to become a 'perfect stranger.'

14. You thank Tom, Jasper, and Gracie for your 'Authentic Indian Name' and always calm, brave, and waiting for signs.

15. You believe Brave New Waves could introduce the masses to the wonders of independent music of all styles and genres, if only it weren't on at midnight.

New Directions?

2006-11-23T14:20:00.000-05:00

Last week I can kind of given up hope of finding a cool job in New Zealand, and resorted that after my stint helping out on a farm, I would sign myself up with an organization that finds assistants for farms. But not wanting to throw in the towel completely, I still looked at some job sites.

After a search this weekend, I have found two posts, both of which I have just applied to, which have given me a new outlook on 'what I want to be when I grow up.' Both posts are almost polar opposites, but would keep me in a school setting - a place, if you've suffered one of my emotional outpourings, know that I haven't been that fulfilled by. I am an odd combination of jock and nerd; someone who knows details about each player on his favourite team, but also someone who prefers an interesting documentary or curling up with a good book to a night on the town. Both of these job options pull at that dichotomy.

The first is a Sports Assistant, at a school south of Auckland. Realizing that someone would need years of experience to become a school's Sport Director, surely this would be the perfect way to start out. Sport Director positions are rare in Canada, where such duties tend to fall upon individual coaches or some brave soul who takes it on top of his/her normal teaching and coaching duties. Dealing with equipment, travel arrangements, and a plethora of administrative stuff sounds like a nightmare to most. However, though it wasn't my favourite part of running the Orillia and Carleton rugby teams, it was an enjoyable job knowing that it was all because of me kids got to play without worrying when/if the next game was going to come. (If only people on the other end were so dilligent in their duties!)

The second is a Resource Assistant at a school in Wellington's northern suburb. I might also digress to say this school is very rare in New Zealand, as the kids don't wear uniforms. I used to be against uniforms, until I worked in England and at Ashbury, and didn't have to see the sad excuses for 'fashion' some kids choose today. But being in a non-uniform school, might also mean that my often shabby dresss won't look so poor by comparison. ;) Anyway, this job would basically see me working in a library - Perfect! you say - I think so too. Despite my jockish devotion to rugby and soccer, I am still the shy nerd underneath. I still read a lot in hopes of becoming more knowledgeable than I already am, and even (secret's out!) belong to a military history book club whereby I can get hardcovers at discount prices. My own personal library at home is quite sizable as I can't resist picking up old text books at church sales or thrift stores. This job also involves distributing AV equipment, and you all know how I love to take pictures and record (okay, okay, bootleg) rugby matches and the occasional rare film/documentary from television.

So, if all goes well, I'll have either of those jobs. Doing so within a school would still allow me to share my passion for education. But I think take a whole new direction as I wouldn't be forced to adhering to a course outline and curriculum, but I'd be able to work with keen athletes/students one on one or in small groups to help them learn what they really want to learn. In thinking about this pursuit, I can't help but think of two inspirational figures from my past who did these jobs and fostered my passion for helping others see their potential. They were Larry Jones, the librarian at my third elementary school, and Jim McElroy a phys ed teacher and super coach at Twin Lakes Secondary School.

I'm sure I'll be able to live up to their standard if I can finally get myself on a track that I care about pursuing.

Wish me luck!

A Lifetime of Remembrance

2006-11-09T23:33:00.000-05:00

I won't go too much into my thoughts on Remembrance Day because if you know me, you know how much I respect our veterans and the men and women who serve our country today. But in light of all the continuing talk about Canada's mission in Afghanistan, with the media always seeming to pounce on every instance of doubt, I saw something interesting this evening that strengthened my feelings about this mission.

As with my thoughts on veterans, I'll spare you all the details as to why I think this is a mission with potential - one we should not walk away from. Essentially, we're welcome by most Afghans, officially by their goverment, and are there under the UN/NATO flag. Though their lives are still hard and less than ideal, one has to feel that their freedom from Taliban persecution, especially for women, has created a situation where things can start to improve if managed and guided properly. The best means of doing so are up for debate, and as I'm no expert, I won't speculate what they are. However, when I hear people saying 'Bring our troops home now,' I can't help but worry that life will instantly get worse for the average Afghan. Our troops seem to want this mission, and anyone who signs up to be a soldier realizes that he or she risks injury or even death. Things may seem stagnant with our foray into the more dangerous Kandahar region, but with more support it seems the reconstruction and peacebuilding initiatives can increase. If anything, our troops need more back up, and it's up to our NATO allies to kick in with more support.

This evening, I watched a program called "In Korea, with Norm Christie." The historian has continued telling the personal stories of Canadian soldiers in the 20th century, this time featuring the oft-neglected Korean War. In talking with one vet from Quebec's own Vandoos (ie. 22e Regiment), the old soldier talked about his experience defending the area north of Seoul called 'The Saddle.' It was a tough battle, and one would be surprised our boys actually held out and repulsed the numerically superior Chinese. His words regarding the outcome were very moving, like all tales from war vets, but this one resonated a bit more, considering what our men and women are faced with in 'The Sandbox' today. I cannot remember his comments word for word, but he talked about looking at the faces of people, familes with kids, in Seoul before visiting the old battle ground. He said looking at the smiles, seeing how happy they were made him realize (with a tearful pause that lasted nearly a minute) that it was in part because of the sacrifice he and his friends made. He stressed that Canadians needed to be proud of what our people did in Korea, and I'm sure as good Canucks, we all are.

I couldn't help but think that his comments somewhat reflect what our people are facing with the Afghanistan mission. You can debate the reasons the US first invaded in October, 2001, but what you can't deny is that Canadians are there to help stabilize a newly democratic nation. Things still aren't perfect five years down the line, but such a task was never going to be easy. I have the confidence that with time, support, and cooperation, this mission will be a success and when I'm old and grey we'll be honouring the sacrifices our people made to ensure that poor, defenceless Afghans might experience some of the freedoms we often take for granted. If we were to leave, no good will come to those people, and on that Remembrance Day in the future we'll have to remember that we didn't, as we do so often and honourably, stand up for the little guy in his time of need. With that in mind, I feel we must stay the course and make yet another important contribution to our world's history.

Update, update!

2006-11-04T19:06:00.000-05:00

It's been brought to my attention that I haven't written in ages, and seeing that July 6th was the last post, I'm ashamed of my neglection. However, from leaving Ottawa in August to now, the beginning of November, my life has been THAT boring!

I've been busy looking and applying for jobs in New Zealand, as of yet, to no avail. I'm still looking, but have found a great way of seeing the country, meeting people, and saving money until I do find a paying job. I've you've never heard the term WWOOFing, it is the verb associated with the acronym WWOOF, which stands for Willing Workers On Organic Farms. This network puts farmers/hostel owners/etc in touch with travellers, offering a roof, bed, and meals for a few hours help a day. There are two catches, all hosts have to be practicing organic producers and all travellers have to pay for the book / website that lists the names and contacts of all the hosts.

Now if you know me, you know that I'm frugal. So I searched for people who were posting such ads without being part of that organization, and I quickly stumbled upon a 'mostly free' site called Help Exchange (www.helpx.net - 'mostly' meaning you can sign up for free, but if you want to be an exclusive host you pay, and travellers wishing to see them have to pay as well. Most people seem to post for free.). I put up a profile explaining who I am, what I can do, and what I'm looking to do in New Zealand. So far, four families have actually contacted me! Three from Canterbury - which seems lovely, but not where I intended to go anything but a possible quick visit, likely for a big match at Jade Stadium - and one from Marlborough. I've had a few emails with this family, and it looks as though that's where I'll be headed first.

As for the last four months ... man, has it been that long? I've moved away from Ottawa, figuring I could save money by living with the 'rents and finding a temporary job. The latter has been very frustrating, but at least I'm saving money ... I guess that's the price I pay for boredom. Aside from my daily job hunt (12 schools and counting, including a temporary flirtation with the idea of going to Japan for a year first), I've helped out around the house with my family's annual quest to stock enough firewood for the winter. Appropriately, my hair has grown long and shaggy, and I've grown an impressive red beard.

In Sept, my hopes of taking a road trip to Nova Scotia or maybe catching the Women's Rugby World Cup were dashed as I realized I shouldn't be cutting so deeply into my New Zealand funds. However, I did shell out a modest sum to attend Dave and Jenny's wedding in Ottawa. I was so honoured to be invited, as I quickly thought they were an amazing couple back when Dave and I were the last survivors at 454 Riverdale. It was a wonderful day, a great ceremony and reception, a good chance to see some old friends again, and take some great photos . . . unfortunately, I had a hard drive crash two weeks later, and lost all of them!!! :( (though one and five of the amazing fall photographs were still on my camera, so I do have those)

Once a week, I've been helping the Twin Lakes SS girls' coach by running some skill sessions for the girls, in hopes they can finally beat the GBSSA perennial champs Barrie Central. I'm not sure it'll happen, but trying to teach newbies keeps me humble and tests my abilities (and sometimes patience!) as a coach, so that's been fun. This coming weekend, we'll be running a clinic for girls in the region to help improve their rugby skills. With the exciting women's world cup having passed in Sept, I really hope to see this area of the Canadian game grow - esp. given our women's four place global ranking (combared to our men's 13th place).

I've also been trying to keep active, in hopes I can shed all the weight I frustratingly gained while working at Ashbury! :( Things have been going well, even since the crap weather has forced me to put my beloved mountain bike away. I'm over two weeks into a new program where I do weight circuits with little rest in between, followed by an intense cardio session. The good news is I've noticed better results in these two weeks than I did during the last month of mostly doing heavy weights with a bit of biking. (if you want a sample of my program, email me and I'll send it!) Aside from wanting to fit into the XL Clifton jersey I work in England, I also want to try and get in a full season of rugby when I'm in New Zealand. Yes, 'super coach' wants to start playing again. Aside from the half season in Bristol, I haven't played serious contact rugby since ... jeez, first year university with Orillia! I also hope to coach, though. Eventhough no one has been able to challenge the New Zealand women's dominance for the last few years, I'm told there isn't much structure for girls rugby down there. I'd really like to be a part of helping that grow, as I think I have here in Canada.

... speaking of, upon my first season away from Carleton, the girls managed to win the Eastern Ontario Fall League! Full credit to Terri and her girls, but I like to think that it was my efforts that rubbed off and allowed them to get there. Here's hoping Tezza and her crew make even bigger leaps in the near future - because I was at Day One of the CIS finals yesterday, and I couldn't help but think my Carleton team from last year would have been competitive at that tournament! (Good luck girls, and keep me posted on how things go!)

Anyway, I guess this is a good enough update for the last four months. I'll try and keep this updated more frequently, giving you some interesting reading while you're at work or should be doing school work. ;)

My Bluesfest "Must-Sees"

2006-07-06T15:52:00.000-04:00

So I'm about to get a festival passport (or whatever it's called - I'm going to a lot, so am getting the best deal) to the Ottawa Bluesfest. This will be my first and last one, as I'm more than likely leaving town at the end of the month. If you're going to any of these or are checking out bands I should be seeing before/after the ones I've listed here and want to meet up, let me know! This could be . . . sniff, sniff . . . your last chance to spend quality time in my presence! :(

Friday, July 7th
Anathallo – 6:15pm
Malajube – 7:30pm
Broken Social Scene – 9:00pm
(all MBNA Stage)

Saturday, July 8th
The Acorn – 6:00pm (Blacksheep Stage)
Jason Collett – 7:30pm
Fiest – 9:00pm
(MBNA Stage)

Monday, July 10th
The Stills – 6:15pm (Main Stage)

Friday, July 14th
Jim Bryson – 7:00pm (Blues Stage)
Metric – 9:00pm (MBNA Stage)

Saturday, July 15th
The Ms – 4:00pm
The New Amsterdams – 5:15pm
Martin Sexton – 6:30pm
(all Main Stage)

Sunday, July 16th
New Pornographers – 9:30pm (Blacksheep Stage)

World Cup Shenanigans

2006-06-27T18:13:00.000-04:00

I love soccer. I also think this has been a better World Cup than the last. Recently, however, fans and even (sadly) 'expert' commentators have been dumping on the refereeing. Yes, some decisions have been shocking. Such is the nature of sport. Referees aren't perfect in any sport, and you'll always see calls that get missed. I don't even think technology would sort it ALL out, but even the talk about bringing in such things would spoil the beauty of this game that rarely stops. In defence of the refs, I offer the following comments:

I wondered if a few things rugby refs do wouldn't have helped Mr. Ivanov in that Dutch v Portuguese encounter.

I said this on another thread, but it looks as though he tried to do the right thing and book a few people early to try and set a tone. Unfortunately evil thoughts filled those player's minds and they seemingly took it as the potential to get others sent off with a bit of timely acting.

Now I think mid-way through the second he started whipping them out for what should have been free kicks. But I wonder if, as in rugby, he'd have been able to call a time out, address his concern to the captains and have them speak to their teams, things might have settled down a bit more? Couldn't have made it worse, I feel, and might have allowed everyone - including the ref - to settle down a bit.

I also think they should let physios come on the field to treat 'injured' players without the ref's permission. As it is the player who's down can stay down regardless of his real injury and eventually get the ref to stop play (and then we deal with all that mess of who tapped the ball out, who gets it back - re: the Dutch vs. Portuguese). If it were done as rugby, and allowed to proceed until it interferes with play, that might actually prompt the player to stop whinging and get back up and join the play. There will be no stoppage, so if he's really not hurt, he's a detriment to his team if he lies there.

I'm not against the idea of sin-binning someone ten minutes or so from the field if their actions have warranted a yellow card. I think it's been good for rugby. I don't know if it'll ever fly though. I remember when the Premier League took measures to crack down on dissent, and the mobbing of referees has stopped, but the average verbal abuse and constant arguing of calls seems to be part of the game, sadly. (I laughed, awkwardly in shock, as I saw a closeup of Ashley Cole the other day calling the ref's assistant a 'fucking wanker' for putting up the flag for what was really a handball on Ashley's part. :? ) I think it'd take some pretty drastic, global moves, to start punishing players so harshly for dissent as you'll even see it in minis and 5-a-side recreational leagues.

I seem to remember a few years ago that they brought in another of rugby's great referee tools - the ability to march players back a further 10m for dissent at a free-kick situation. Now I can't remember (and can't be bothered to look up) if this was just for the English Premier League, or if it was for FIFA as a whole? If so, I think refs need to use this more often and would be a better deterrent than the sin-bin idea. Really, who'd want to let someone like Beckham or Zidane have a free kick closer to goal, or even a free kick inside the penalty area itself?!?! (I've seen a few, and they always go in.)

It's a conspiracy!

2006-05-02T12:37:00.000-04:00

One of my students found a controversial documentary about the questions conspiracy theorists have about the 9/11 incident. His posting of the link, and the subsequent discussions on our Boarding message board have spawned the biggest set of replies the board has ever seen. Forever the skeptic of such conspiracy theorists, believing that the obvious answer is probably the right one nine times out of ten, I had to wade into this debate.

Off the cuff, I came up with this response and am pretty proud of the results. (esp. as I've lost my voice and can't actively engage in any verbal discussions at this point! :)

>>>>>>>>>>>

I fail to see the meaning to an end for most of the conspiracy theories. Why would the US want to kill thousands of their own citizens? They've been more clever in the past about doing such things if the end was to eventually have 'justification' for invading Afghanistan (very weak, more about 'revenge' there I feel) and Iraq (less 'weak,' but still a long shot as they had to really drive the UN on inspections and then still had to spin the 'evidence.') This with no loss of life - look up Tonkin Gulf Incident, 1964.
The only one I can possibly see is that the plane headed for the Pentagon may have been shot down . . . not a huge conspiracy, but official admission of this would be slightly sensitive to the Administration. (Justifiable act, most would say, but still a bit iffy.)

The US Gov't also has a history of collecting all the evidence of their sensitive incidents to keep it out of the mainstream spotlight. However, I feel that this only breeds the conspiracy theorists. If you ever watch Discovery Wings or know anything about the development of new air technology during the Cold War, you really start to put pieces to the 'puzzle' that is the UFO phenomenon. Incidents like Roswell probably involved nothing more than the crash of a super-secrent aircraft project, but the US Gov's tendency to keep things secret for however long they can legally keep documents sealed (is it 50 or 75 years?) tends to make people wonder even more and build their imaginative 'solutions' to the point of ridiculousness.

My two cents. :)

A case against the defence.

2006-03-05T20:17:00.000-05:00

In my little rugby discussion group, I managed to pull off this little gem in lieu of an article on how Six Nations and Superr 14 rugby has been somewhat boring this year due to increased focus on defence. I've always been one to appreciate a well-placed kick to get the ball forward, take advantage of territory, or try and catch the defence unawares, but the amount of high balls and lack of commitment to the run this year has been shocking. At least three times a match, and usually more often than that, I'm cursing at my computer (I get every S14 game via the net), "Why didn't you pass/run? You had the advantage!!!" as the scrum/fly half goes for yet another tactical kick.

Anyway, here's my thoughts on defence and Leinster's backs coach's hint that a Law ammendment might be in order:

Creeping offside at the breakdown is definitely an issue that has to be addressed. Might getting the touch judges more involved help? We obviously don't want to be hearing the whistle all the time, but each team has at least one player who lives for that moment the ref turns his back giving him the opportunity to stand in 'no man's land.'

On that note, the whole defensive line is just a little bit (but maybe now starting to show) closer because teams don't commit many people to rucks. You'll even see when teams commit no one, leaving just the tackler in the pile, standing almost in line with the ball because 'no ruck has been formed.' I teach my teams to 'pick their battles' at the ruck as well, because what's the sense of contesting for the ball when the ball carrier and support player have fallen in such a way that only a powerlifter could 'ruck' them off the ball? This often results in more defenders standing than players for the team in possession.

It's no wonder teams elect to kick first and try and penetrate from broken play. I think it's different outside of the pro/national ranks because our defenses aren't as well-drilled and effective. But the new focus on defensive systems has definitely been making for boring rugby the last little while. I'm not sure if there's something so drastic as Laws amendments needed, but I'd like to see something a bit more creative than 15+ up and unders/box kicks a match!

Top Styles of Music

2006-02-14T13:40:00.000-05:00

I was telling someone the other day that Swing is probably the one style of music I do not discriminate against. I tend to like it all, no matter the time period, the band leader, or the singer. Saying that shocks some people who know me for my indie/punk leanings. It got me thinking about what types of music I actually appreciate. Time for another list, with genre of music and band/artist who I think typifies the sound. (Please don't be pedantic about the styles and associated bands. It's my attempt to pigeon-hole for the benefit of discussion. I'm not as big a music snob as some people think.)

1. Swing/Big Band - Duke Ellington

2. Ska - The Slackers

3. Reggae - Bob Marley

4. Brit Pop - Dodgy

5. Punk (no mall punk, pop punk!) - The Clash/Rancid

6. British Invasion - The Beatles

7. Motown - Smokey Robinson

8. Jazz - John Coltrane

9. Post/Prog Rock - The Mars Volta/Trail of Dead

10. Gospel - Southern American Church Choirs

Hard to Classify: Indie Rock, Classical/Symphonic

Wish I Knew More About: African Roots, Mod

Drinking to Olympic Proportions!

2006-02-10T19:26:00.000-05:00

I was thinking now that the Olympics are upon us once again, I will be parked on the couch a lot more than I have been since the summer. It's no secret, I love my History Television, the CBC, and The Comedy Network. Since starting the new job, I haven't watched more than a 4-5 hours of tv a week max. Time for that to change, now that the games of the (insert however many we're at now) Olympiad are upon us. It's kind of funny that I love winter Olympics more than summer, but can only stand to partake in one winter sport - cross-country skiing.

Excited for the first events to start, I started to dread, however, the massive amount of cliches and coverage 'talking points' that are (apparently) a necessary evil during this sporting event. So, for my friends who like to partake in the occasional injesting of alcoholic beverages, I have created for you . . .

The Olympics Coverage Drinking Game

Chug when:
- the announcer says this should be 'our best medal haul ever' (or something to that effect
- an athlete says "I'm just happy to be here."
- shotgun a beer immediately afterward if the athlete said the above statement, AND won a medal!
- if watching US coverage, drink for as long as you see coverage of a sport that features no Americans in medal contention

Drink when:
- Terry Leibel says 'Welcome back, it's [insert time] here in Turin.'
- Brian Williams says 'Alllllllrighty then.' (credit: Yasmeen)
- the announcer mentions the athlete's hometown
- the announcer mentions the name of his/her parents
- the announcer compares current medal standings to previous year's achievement
- the Canadian athlete finishes fourth ("It's a part of our heritage.")
- you hear Russ Howard yell "Haaaaaaarrrrrrrrd!"
- anytime announcers shamelessly plug Hudson Bay Company's involvement with the Olympic Team clothing
- while watching US coverage, if the announcer expresses regret that the athlete who finished in 24th was unlucky not to have medalled
- while flipping to the US station during time when events should be 'live,' and they're showing US programming instead
- you hear the words 'illegal betting'
- if you see an athlete bite their medal (credit: Steph)
- if an athlete cries during an interview (credit: Steph)
- two drinks for a crying figure skater, and three for a crying male figure skater - because somebody has to 'man-up' for that guy!
- a skier immediately takes his/her skiis off at the bottom of a run and holds them up to display the manufacturer (credit: Josh)
- s speedskater is 'controversially bumped'
- if the announcer speculates that this could be the athlete's 'last appearance' (credit: Colin)

. . . more to come as I think of them. Feel free to submit your own.

_______________________

The day after writing this, it occured to be that with Turin 6 or 7 hours ahead, many of the events will be in the morning. I guess you can still drink then, but try leaving it to the afternoon coverage, okay?

Canada vs. US . . . or is that US vs. THEM?

2006-02-07T00:29:00.000-05:00

I frequently visit a message board for rugby supporters. The topics range from analysis of the latest games to polls on who's the hottest 40+ year old actress. Thought-provoking stuff, indeed. Among the regulars, there are one or two Canadians who constantly boast our nation and belittle the Americans. Having finally gotten sick of the close-minded attacks, I addressed my (typically Canadian) apologies to one American poster in particular. The result won me some accolades and I realized it was a worthy, albeit short, peice of writing I wanted to save.

fatoldhooker, I had a great prof teach me Canadian History in university (one of the most respected in Canada, in fact) and he opened our eyes to the fact that it's part of our psyche to constantly build ourselves up by pointing out all your faults. The famous quote by our PM Trudeau put it as "a mouse in bed with an elephant . . . no matter how friendly . . . one is affected by every twitch and grunt."

As a teacher of history, I'm aware of the fact that we're not perfect and actually have some rather embarassing moments in our past - notably much contradiction between what we say and what we do where our relations with the US are concerned, including a lot of the things we criticize 'Americans' for. We're very similar, almost indistinguishable to outsiders in fact, but as we're that mouse who fears being crushed it's in our mentality to take as many little swipes at you as we can to ensure we get our percieved breathing room.

Part of what the prof had to say is that we're so bombarded by US culture - as is the world - that we seek to define ourselves by showing how different (whether true or not) we are in light of those examples.

On behalf of all of us, sorry.

Toffs at the top, plebs at the bottom.

2006-01-13T14:10:00.000-05:00

Over the past week, I've been watching every episode of the classic British comedy series Black Adder. If you've never seen it, I cast shame upon thee and bid you rent them or get on the waiting list for the ones I got form the library. It's Rowan Atkinson (ie. Mr. Bean) portraying four generations of members of the Blackadder family. He is conniving, rude, oftentimes cowardly, hilariously insulting, and despite these traits, endearing in his quest to suffer the idiots around him, gain forture, and preserve his life.

The first series has him as a prince to ficticious King Richard IV, one of the newphews jailed in the tower as a boy and supposedly killed by Richard III. The first episode conveniently writes him in history as the successor to Richard III, killed at the Battle of Bosworth Field. In the writer's hilarious version, Blackadder, late to battle and too cowardly to join the main fight, kills the first noble he sees. Unbeknownst to Blackadder he lops the head off his uncle Richard as he's urinating against a tree. This launches Blackadder's father to the throne (when it was really Henry Tudor in history) but from the start he is ignored and struggles to gain recognition in a hilarious series of events.

The second series suggests that he is dropping in stature, and the latter two would add to that theory. In the second, he's a Lord in the court of Queen Elizabeth I. In the third, he's a butler to George, Prince Regent to the mad king, George III. Finally, in the fourth, he's a captain trying to save his own skin amid the carnage and madness of World War One's French-Belgian frontier. Veteran British actors Tony Robinson, Miranda Richardson, Tim McInnery, Hugh Laurie and Stephen Fry play characters in recurring themed roles.

Featuring the brilliant writing of Richard Curtis and Ben Elton, the 24 episodes of this show are some of the best comedy I've ever seen. Having a knowledge of history helps you appreciate the jokes, but it's ultimately not necessary as Richard Curtis admits that they didn't even research it that well, relying on Elton's interest in history. I guess it endears to Brits as the writers include most of what they learned through school history courses. You could just imagine what could be done if we had a period comedy that made light of Macdonald's Pacific Scandal, Laurier's flip flopping, King's psychic reader, and Trudeau's extravagance.

Some of these episodes are almost as effective as History Bites for their 'teachable moments' and our impending national election has put an episode from Series Three into this context for me. And finally, I get to my point. On the eve of yet another election I find the political jokes in 'Dish and Dishonesty,' episode one in Black Adder the Third, very timely. I'll take the opportunity to post a few quotes and explain where they are coming from if it isn't so clear.

M: Oh, has there been a general election, then, Mr. Blackadder?
E: Indeed there has, Mrs. Miggins.
M: Oh, well, I never heard about it.
E: Well of course you didn't; you're not eligible to vote.
M: Well, why not?
E: Because virtually no-one is: women, peasants, (looks at Baldrick)
chimpanzees (Baldrick looks behind himself, trying to see the animal),
lunatics, Lords...
B: That's not true -- Lord Nelson's got a vote!
E: He's got a *boat*, Baldrick. Marvelous thing, democracy. Look at
Manchester: population, 60,000; electoral roll, 3.

Ah, back in the days when you had to be a landowner to vote. There's a reference in the historical notes that rural Cornwall had over 20 seats in parliament whereas London had 6. How things have changed, where every citizen is eligible to have his or her say.

Blackadder seeks to fix a by-election to make sure his boss, the Prince Regent, is not ousted by the Whigs in the currently balanced Parliament. They put up their own candidate it what is a 'rotten borough' - a place with it's own seat of government but with very few actual residents and usually controlled by a corrupt landowner.

E: What we need is an utter unknown yet someone over whom we have complete power. A man with no mind, with no ideas of his own. One might almost say a man with no brain. (he rings the servant bell)
G: Well...any thoughts?
E: Yes, Your Highness.
(Baldrick, the idiotic, disgusting servant enters)
B: You rang, My Lord?
E: (to George) Meet the new member of Parliament for Dunny-on-the-Wold.
G: But he's an absolute arsehead!
E: Precisely, sir. Our slogan shall be: "A rotten candidate for a rotten
borough."

This part reminds me how even today parties seek to find someone who'll fit-in with the constituents, using that person to appeal to a certain demographic. It's also occasionally the case where said person had never even lived in that riding! It also seems like many of our top politicians are at the hands of 'professional' image consultants and back room strategists. Are they people or puppets?

While filling out the application to become a member of parliament:
E: Now then; criminal record...
B: Absolutely not.
E: Oh, come on, Baldrick, you're going to be an MP, for God's sake! I'll just put `fraud and sexual deviancy.'

They even do a great mockery of the television correspondent (typically dry and boring) who's giving a running commentary of the election results as it's done today on tv. Remember this is early 19th Century, so he's a newspaper reporter talking out of the balcony to a crowd on on-lookers. Said newspaper reporter was actually played by political commetator Vincent Hanna who was listed as "his own great-great-great grandfather" in the credits. How clever.

Remembering that there was only one actual eligible voter in this 'rotten borough' . . .
H: Good evening and welcome to the Dunny-on-the-Wold bye-election. The first thing I must tell you is that the turnout has been very good. As a matter of fact, the voter turned out before breakfast. And I can bring you the result of our exculsive exit poll, which produced a 100-percent result for "Mind-Your-Own-Business-You-Nosy-Bastard."

H: And now let's have a word from the Adder Party candidate, Mr. S. Baldrick, who so far has not commented on his policies in this campaign, but with him is his election agent, Mr. E. Blackadder.
E: Well, we in the Adder Party are going to fight this campaign on issues, not personalities.
H: Why is that?
E: Because our candidate doesn't have a personality.

Wait, that's an interview with Stephen Harper's campaign manager . . . nope, I was right the first time, that's from Black Adder the Third. :) Again, I wonder if some candidates truly have their own personalities or is what we see manufactured to appeal to what studies and opinion polls tell them we like? I also would really like to hear the full platform of the parties (including, sadly, the one I will be voting for!) - real issues - and not cheap attacks directed at the other candidates and their parties. I am willing to bet that if one of the leaders would stop with the personal attacks and take the moral high ground, he would appeal to all of us who are sick of the cheap shots and win a majority based on apparent honesty. Let's just hope we don't totally adopt American-style politcs!

Anyway, hilarious stuff all around. I suggest you check out this series if you can.
Don't forget to vote on the 23rd, even if your candidate/party leader is an 'absolute arsehead.'

Film: Munich

2006-01-12T10:25:00.000-05:00

The other day I went to see 'Munich', referring to the 1972 Olympics where 11 Israeli athletes were killed by Palestinian terrorists. Where the film touches upon the incident to set the scene it focuses on the Israeli hit squad that went to kill 11 Palestinians supposedly involved with that event or other PLO activities. I did some reading on the subject before and after (though the actual book 'Vengeance' by George Jonas is on a 50+ person waiting list at my local library!), and the film is going to remain nothing short of controversial, but I feel not for the assumed reasons.

I don't think I'm going to spoil anything, but beware, just in case.

Spielberg knows how charged this topic can be, which is apparently why there was so much secrecy surrounding the production of this film and why it took so long from idea to final edit. Apparently he wanted to get it 'right' given the political climate. As such, he and the writer take a bit of a moral high ground and don't totally villify one side or the other. The Palestinians in the Black September gang and those on 'the list' are shown with a certain degree of humanity, especially the latter as you see them going about their daily business. Two of them are even shown to be very friendly and even likable. Most of the hit squad deal with guilt, question the 'guilt' of some of the men on the list, etc. As such it takes the middle ground, and Spielberg has already been criticized by several people for it. Seems you can't win by NOT having true good and bad guys either!

The review I read by the actual author of Vengeance who suggests this detracts from the 'true' story (but admits that as the film starts with 'inspired by true events' and that he wasn't even consulted for it, acknowledges that Spielberg has the right to do as he wishes with it). He says that when he intervied the man known as 'Avner' in the 80s, he wasn't really repentant for what he had done. This may have changed over time, who knows? He goes on to say the production team told him they had spoken to 'Avner' recently, so maybe he's changed? He also questions showing 'humanity' in those terrorists whose actions were deliberately evil - where even many Palestinians thought what Black September did was way over the top. To add to the whole mess, Israeli officials (former Generals, agents in Mossad) claim that the person known as 'Avner' is actually a fraud, and that the events told in 'Vengeance,' the first movie on the subject 'Sword of Gideon,' and now 'Munich' are all based on this fraud.

Any historian, like myself, drools/agonises over this kind of stuff. Who's telling the truth, or are there several pieces of the truth? Is 'Avner' really a fraud who told a fantastic story to gain financially or a disgruntled agent who felt his beloved country had let him down and now he's going to come out of the cold? As such, are his superiors trying to discredit him because he's insulting the hard work done by many other brave agents or are they doing so because there are secrets to keep and people (like the PM, generals, etc.) who don't want to be seen by history as guilty of illegal international assassinations? I guess we'll never know the full truth, but it makes for great viewing if you look at the history behind it.

Apart from two cheesy (and apparently made up) scenes regarding 'olive trees' and sex, I really like the film.

New Year, New Quests

2006-01-02T22:00:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year . . . to my Orthodox brothers and sisters, on the 13th, and to my Chinese compatriots, on the 29th.

My tradition of boring calendar changes continues. I'll spare you the sorry details, but wish you the best for the coming year. I can't help but wondering if I'll be around for the next one - wow, that sounds morbid. No, I don't mean dead, but where in the world I'll be. Where that place might be changes from week to week as something about those places particularly catches my interest. I think, however, I have narrowed the list down to two Southern Hemisphere nations. I'm doing my best to seek out jobs, and New Zealand offers the best resources to find one here, but South Africa is fast catching up, now that a 'Saffa' friend of mine has told me that there IS a need for skilled workers despite the high unemployment rate. Too bad they don't advertise these online as well as the Kiwis do.

Oh well. On the note of 'writing things' down (ie. this is NOT a resolution), I do aim to work towards that novel, and with all the free time I have at school, I shouldn't have any excuses in avoiding research. I also want to get 'fighting fit' so I can start playing rugby again, and well, and hopefully as a powerful centre. That quest began in November. I also want to help the rugby in Orillia grow even further, and maybe enter a tournament with some of the boys I used to coach, which should be a fitting send off, I think, for so many cherished years with them.

_________________________________________

On the tune-skis list:
Broken Social Scene (two albums and an EP)
Death Cab For Cutie (thanks for that rec. Matt, now must discover Minus The Bear)
Thrice
Tegan and Sarah
The Organ

Just a stroll down memory lane

2005-12-30T22:20:00.000-05:00

Last night I went searching for a negative of one of the best photos I've ever taken. It's a shot of a blue-green river, with mist coming off it, coniferous trees silhouetted on either side with a deep blue sky and a solitary star. I took it at about 2am on my old Pentax P3, propped up on a chair at very slow shutter speed. I took one shot, hoping that it would turn out, and it was practically brilliant. Aim to get it blown up and framed.

But this took me into an old shoe box that contained all my un-albumed photos and negatives. In the vacinity was the photo box my aunt gave to me for Christmas last year - or was it the one before? - so I decided to transfer them. What I found was a series of pics that took me from before my trip to England, sometime in late 2004, all the way back to my stint as a coach at a summer basketball camp. That must have been 1995 or thereabouts.

Going through those pictures was quite the journey, and somewhat emotionally draining. I kinda wish I wrote this after having done so, but was too spent to even think about it - and didn't have easy access to a computer anyway. But on the other hand, I think it might have made things worse, and therefore glad I'm getting these words down now.

Why is that, you ask? Yes, those photos contained thousands of words (wanted to say millions, but I don't think we have that many!), each with stories I could almost recall as if they happened yesterday. Lots of landscapes from my solo adventures through the lands I grew up on. Raucous times in university with friends departed and still remaining. Cherished moments from high school which often seem like a blur, only to be made clear again all through these photographs. Most people would love to have such memories made more clear. The emotional sting, however, is as prominant as the warm feelings and tends to follow the initial gush of happiness. Those photos contained images of people who have long since gone their own way, or whom I have gone my own way from.

When those first series were taken way back in high school, those seemed like the best times of my life. Great fun with great friends and not so much as a worry outside of having to study for an easy test or read up on source material for an enjoyable essay. Even as I moved on to university, and met a new core of good friends, those old ones seemed do drift away. As I write this, I can count on one hand the amount of high school friends I still talk to. That is also starting to become true with my university friends, having been three years now since my final graduation. But I guess that's all part of growing up and finding your own way in life.

It royally sucks leaving such amazing moments and friendships in photo albums that mostly gather dust on my bookshelf, only to be opened every six months or so, a reminder of relationships severed and moments never to be repeated.

I guess I have to feel blessed that I do have those moments recorded in a clearer format than my fuzzy memory. Most people can't say that about the best years of their lives. I do cherish those I still maintain contact with, and guess I aim to hold onto them a little tighter knowing that it's so easy to let each other slip by the wayside. I only wish that I could have saved everyone of those friendships as well as I've saved the images of the goodtimes we had together.

- - - - - - - -

I have finally started collecting dvds. Much like my dad, but not as hardcore, I don't like watching most films a second time in a short period of time. There are several movies, however, for which this doesn't apply so I am limiting myself to acquiring them.

So far I have a sizable collection of the best war films of all time (well duh, you say), but add to it: Fletch Lives, About a Boy, Boondock Saints (amazing found used!), Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, and High Fidelity.

- - - - - - -

They say that if you want to stick by something, you should write it down and/or tell someone. Well, the other day I got an idea for what I feel will make a fantastic novel. I told Angi about it, and so now I'm going to complete the second condition and write it down. When I get back to Ottawa, I'm going to start casually researching the finer elements that will make this pipe dream of mine a reality.

End of Year: Top Five Bands

2005-12-06T23:40:00.000-05:00

There have been a couple of changes over the past year in terms of my good old 'top five' list. The basic criteria is that the band has to have put out at least three albums. Doves released a gem in the spring and are now eligible. I finally picked up the last Weakerthans album, which gets better with each listen. In no specific order:

1. The Clash

2. The Charlatans

3. Sloan

4. The Weakerthans

5. Doves

Bore-ding Life?

2005-11-29T15:25:00.000-05:00

Music for the Moment:
New Pornographers - These Are the Fables / The Bleeding Heart Show
The Organ - Love Love Love / Brother
The International Noise Conspiracy (Armed Love LP)
The Lost Patrol Band (s/t LP)
Metric (Live It Out LP)
Neko Case - If You Knew / Trains From Kansas City

Veritable Viewing
Hotel Rwanda / Shake Hands With the Devil documentary (watch these two together)
Fletch Lives - Chevy Chase comedy
Heartbreak Ridge - Clint Eastwood as an old ass Marine
A Bridge Too Far - best war movie ever? Yeah, probably.
The Charlatans DVD - 13 live songs, and all 18 videos (yes, that many!) released between 1990-97.

The recurring question I've been getting lately is, 'What are you up to?' I feel pretty embarassed when I reply, 'Nothing.' I have, however, enjoyed the last two weeks of chill-out time and don't really have any regrets. I've been listening to music, doing a bit of reading, and actually managed to get my butt in the gym regularly.

I think I'm at that wonderful stage where not making it to the gym is less than acceptable, and feeling pretty good about it. Now it's just a matter of burning off some of what's been gained from this blessed/cursed free meals I get at school! There are no excuses when the gym and weight room is but a one minute walk from your bedroom. Living on campus at a boarding school definitely has it's advantages.

My flatmate and I took it upon ourselves to fix the cable in our common room and now the lads (ie. mostly us) enjoy cable tv on the 60" big screen. Movie nights are a blast as well. With our local branch of the Public Library just a block away, I've been keeping the nice ladies there busy with my requests for films and documentaries from all over the city. The same goes for books, but I can't complain about the school library. TLSS had a good assortment, but they didn't have full volumes on topics like the role of the Commandos in WWII or the lastest, or like the one I'm currently reading which features Canada's role on D-Day, hour-by-hour, as told by the men who were there.

I may only get out to see the odd film or go work out at Carleton, but I've defintely got all the comforts of home in my little boarding school.

What now?

2005-10-25T09:24:00.000-04:00

With rugby about to be finished soon, I'm starting to wonder what I'm going to do to fill my time until spring rugby starts at school. I've found this year to be somewhat stressful, and not quite sure if it's actually because of the conditions within the team or if it's pressure I'm putting on myself to make things better. There are some undertones of discontent and, at least the first time I've noticed it in my three years, some personal conflicts between players. Maybe that's part of it as well. I've pretty much always had teams that got along, were the best of friends for the most part, with only the odd personal matter. But I guess guys tend not to get overly emotional about stuff, and the word 'forgiveness' may not be a word they know, but it's definitely something that comes easier to them. I've just found it odd that despite only losing one game in six, and one we might have won if we had our full team, that morale seems to be less than one would expect. In two weeks, we can all go to our respective corners and chill.

The impending end of our 'regular' season and the end of what has been a great introduction to rowing at school has got me wondering what I'm going to do next. The smart idea would be to get some shifts at another job and make some money. Screw that. Yesterday I emailed the War Museum/Museum of Civilization people about doing some volunteer work there. Such work is fun for me, and probably my ideal job. Too bad opportunities seem so few and far between in that line of work. I figure volunteering, while being something fun to do in my spare time, might open some doors for me, or at least give me some more recent experience to tack on the old CV. (It might also mean free passes, so stay tuned!)

Have made the decision to go back home in the summer, as I'm hoping to go travelling again at the end of 2006. I'd like to make it a longer trip, so intend to spend time with my family and also put in a big effort to helping Orillia rugby become more stable. Steve Clark and Colin Boolsen-Voorster honourably kept what Jeff Marchildon started and I continued alive and well last summer, with the addition of a girls team to boot. I hear Colin has minis going now, and this can only be better for the future of rugby in the Orillia area. We're also hoping to get a men's team going again, now that there are so many guys out of the U18 framework. Hoping to dig up enough committed bodies to keep that team going, without having to scramble for players each week as is the norm for small town teams. With the tradition for good school and junior club rugby over the past few years, I'm sure those guys exist so it's just a matter of finding them. It'd also be great if we can dig up new people to the area who, if they don't have experience, at least have an interest to play.

As for where I'm going, I'm hoping to catch a bit of the women's Rugby World Cup at the beginning of September. It's in Edmonton so it should be worth the trip. Have some contacts out there, too, so hopefully I won't have to pay for lodging! Dave and Jenny are going to tie the knot in the middle of September, so I intend to stay around that long - as depressing as it is to see people your age getting married, I'm very happy for them. It looks, then, that I'm headed back to the South West of England. My Visa is only good until January of 2007, though, so I'm hoping to find a job that will acquire a work permit for me. If not, I'll just do a little vacation to see the things I didn't get to see when I was last in the UK, but it'd be fun to get at least a year (or two, or more?) out of it as the men's World Cup is in France (and I think Ireland and Wales) in 2007. That would be pretty amazing.

If so, you're all invited to come over and party up. If, as you know I'm likely to do so, I settle there, you HAVE to come visit and/or move over with me because ahead of spring days and my family, it's my friends I'll miss the most!

---------------------------------------------

Been into a lot of comedy this past month. Maybe it's because of all the less-than-perfectness, and I just need to be made to laugh.

Recommendations: the comedy of Dane Cook www.danecook.com and the sketch comedy of 'Little Britain'

Man, that is so Canadian!

2005-09-24T23:34:00.000-04:00

Walking down to get some cookies at Loeb and 'za at Mr. Mozzarella, I was listening to my 'Canadian Rock' compilation on my mini-disc player. Upon listening to a stretch of songs by The Flashing Lights, I had to remark that they seemed very 'Canadian' to me. Simple, honest, optimistic, positive (even lost love is laced with the idea that the rejected will move on) and fun-loving. So it made me think 'What bands make me think of Canada?' or more importantly, what music will I be re-mixing into that disc before I go travelling again?

To put it simply, another Top Five list. Check these bands out if you don't know them!

1. The Weakerthans - John K. Sampson's witty and/or poetic lyrics highlight this Winnipeg band. Occasional pedal steel guitar really gives it that 'western' feel without being as offensive to my ears as country music!

2. The Flashing Lights - Kinda like Sloan (who didn't make the cut, because they're an obvious choice), but I think actually do better harmonies than the boys from Halifax. Lead man Mike Muprhy is apparently no relation to the famous leg-kicking Chris.

3. K-Os - My choice for representing Canada's wonderful mix of cultures. A black hip hopper who is a half decent singer and a terrific writer. Cast of real musicians add a real flavour to his music, which also touches on reggae, funk, rock, and jazz traditions.

4. A Northern Chorus - Almost symphonic in their scope, this band creates the most amazing 'chill music' I've ever heard, and without electronical programming. This five-peice seems to play about 20 instruments in each song showing that those band geeks in school really were cool!

5. The New Pornographers - This was the side project that became a band more popular than the groups the original members came from. Kind of like an all-star team of Canadian musicians, with the added bonus of Neko Case's wonderfully unique vocals. Carl Newman writes incredible pop tunes and his bandmates help to make it sound light and inspiring. (Their videos are well worth the watch for some great dance moves or just pure mayhem.)

H-Hour, D-Day impending.

2005-08-30T21:47:00.000-04:00

"What does the 'D' in 'D-Day' stand for?"

Probably the most common question that comes up when you're talking about D-Day to a non-history buff. Truthfully, I don't exactly know the answer, but I'm fairly certain it simply stands for 'Day.' So, did the Allied command start the annoying trend of saying the word that the code/acronym letter was meant to replace? Possibly. It would definitely rank up there with the worst example of this: the utterance of the phrase 'PIN number.' The 'N' in PIN stands for number. Everyone says this, even people who's job entails asking thousands of people a week (or more!) for their 'PIN number.' "What's that, ma'am? Okay, my personal identification number number is . . . " It also ranks up there with the brief period after CD technology became popular where she referred to them as CD discs. Same thing, but I'm sure she was among a select few with that one.

My own D-Day is fast approaching, too fast it seems. I was hoping to get home to Floral Park this week, but it turns out my presence was required at daily meetings at school. Two more days of . . . no three! . . . meetings left to go and it's move in for the borders on Monday. Fun stuff. Seriously, I need a vacation . . . from my vacation.

Quick aside: telling the student loans people you haven't worked since March really freaks them out. Try it sometime but reassure them you have money. I wonder if they think I work in illegal activity? I don't! I swear! (Though I could use 20Gs to pay off my loans!)

Everything's gonna hit me quick next week with rugby tryouts and school. Gonna be a rough ride to get into a routine, but I have the feeling the year is going to go by very quickly. Good thing too, as I've pretty much decided to go back to Orillia for the summer and help the boys get a men's team off the ground. Quick trip back to get the girls on their final season with me, and then it's off to . . . ???? Who knows? New Zealand is the dream, but also have options (ie. contacts) for South Africa and Ireland. Fun, eh? This is definitely going to be 'Re-evaluation Time' in which I decide if I really want to be a teacher. The strongest feelings point to 'NO' but there's a lingering toward 'YES' in one of the aforementioned countries, in a great setting. Even being a teacher in the New Zealand Defence Force could be an option.

Learning new, real skills is a desire though and I've been thinking about becoming a paramedic. The long and short of it is that I want to work in a job where I can make a 'real' difference and help people who genuinely need/want to be helped. I just haven't got that vibe from teaching regular school kids. I really don't seem to deal with over-stimulation of the senses well, either. A regular shift job has been fine with me, but combined with lots of travel and homework when I was teaching in England didn't sit well with my health. Felt emotionally drained and didn't have the energy to do anything once I got home, because I was so dead at the end of the day - which is longer than most jobs, having to do prep and marking, etc. after the job 'ended.' We'll see what this year brings, however, but I'm very optimistic for next summer to arrive and hopefully a renewed outlook on life!

Been a long time. Been a long, lonely, lonely time.

2005-07-16T21:12:00.000-04:00

Okay, not really. Been two months since my last post, and it's probable that no one comes to visit this anymore but let's just chalk one up for old time's sake and get back in the habit of writing . . . run-on sentences and all.

England was 'awesome' to put so much fun into one word - and I mean the true sense of the word, not the de-valued slang sense of the word. Truly am in 'awe' at the experience. Thought it wasn't the place for me when I was in Bristol, but find myself missing it. Gonna try the New Zealand experiment (see below) in over a year's time, but if nothing else works out, I can see myself living in the UK. It'd have to be rural, maybe Wales or Scotland (or over in the Republic of Eire?), and if it's teaching, it'd have to be a nice, small rural school where the kids aren't little bastards! :)

Back in Ottawa for the summer, lazing around, coaching rugby, not working . . . why? Well, I finally managed to land a long term 'teaching' job at Ashbury College in Ottawa. Yes, it's a private school. Yes, I will have to shave and dress smartly. Oh, jeez. What have I got myself into??? Should be good for me to grow up a bit, and get a bit serious about the whole teaching thing. It'll be just my speed, too, as I'm not a teacher but a 'Residential Don.' Basically, I'm on contract to be a part of Boarding Life at the school, my roles being to play a big part in extra-curricular activities all year long, and act as supply teacher, house supervisor two days a week and a weekend a month. Get paid nicely, room and board covered, and I'm definitely going to have a lot of fun doing the job. After it's over in June, I will have enough to finally take that trip to New Zealand I've been talking about.

The best part is that I still get to put a big effort into the Carleton's women's team. Watch this space, as this should be our best season ever. The big push to become a varsity team is on!

. . . well, that's all I got to say. As it's just rugby that really fills my life right now, I don't have much to write about. Keep in touch, yeah? (You'll notice the small selection of English words I have added to my lexicon, and that I can't say 'eh' anymore, having replaced it with the oh-so-English 'yeah.' My poor rugby captain at Clifton, Frazer Halliday, a South African, has lost his 'saffa' accent after three years and puts 'yeah' at the end of every sentence where we would put 'eh.')

Mentioned in Dispatches

2005-05-10T11:05:00.000-04:00

With the UK rugby season nearing it's end, and with every team analysing what the hell went wrong/right this past year, my club, Clifton RFC, was no different with each side giving an insider's account of events. Despite having my name spelled wrong, I was pleased to get a mention although I only stood in for five games.

All in all it was another successful year for the Bandits. More wins than losses, and a wealth of young talent, stashed secretly away from the prying eyes of the coaches and managers of the higher teams.
The season started off well with record numbers turning out for pre-season training (Yes, 3 players is now the new record for the Bandits!). It was soon decided to form a strategic training partnership with the freshly faced and enthusiastic Colts team. Them teaching us the laws and us in turn teaching them how best to “interpret them” to their own advantage. Before we knew it, a number of us found ourselves roped into a pre-season Colts tour to Truro. Even though most were nearly 7 years older than the oldest legal Colts! Ian Wright showing that interpretation is everything and interpreting under 19 to mean under 19… Stone! After taking a game or two to find our feet (And some extra players), we were finally able to put together a very strong XIII and come away with some famous victories. Admittedly rugby union does “normally” consist of XV players in a side but I soon convinced the squad that the addition of two other players only complicated the expansive style notorious with Bandits rugby.

Lizard Lounge and La Rocca fast lived up to their reputation of being awesome recruitment grounds, and with an influx of students we were soon putting out teams boasting a fully loaded reserve bench. A shortage of props seemed to be our downfall all season with Mark Kendall having to play through a number of injuries (including multiple concussions) just to keep the scrums contested. This often left room for veteran Steve White, Spencer “The Big Gun” Halliday and myself to showcase our scrumaging prowess. Add the occasional brilliance of the legendary Nigel “Mr. BIG” Cooley and you had the makings of a front row that, at first glimpse, would strike fear into all that dare cross us. Foreign import Rob Nickol joined late in the season and soon became a firm favourite with all players, now safe in the knowledge that with his arrival minimised their chances of being called up to the front lines!

Second row and back row was awash with changes throughout the season. Steve White, Andy Hurd, Tim Gomm, Ben Zaug, Big Gav, James Cowel, Joe Marsden, John Frizzel, Nick Bloor, Norbs (does any know the real name of Cliftons phantom Barman?!), Oliver Harman, Richard Valentine, Paul Stevens and yes, even Dave Trew. Still having his odd run out for the Bandits (albeit more like a walk-out than a run-out these days!). A schooner of sherry and Snickers, before each game, said to be the secret of his longevity and a true testament to the game of old.

As always the Bandits backs lent some stability to an ever changing team. What they lacked in ability they made up for with… um…ummm… pride. All talented players they moved, reluctantly, in and out of position with ease. The familiar call of “Hands” and “M1”, proving to be the stock of our extensive tactic book. Regulars included the likes of John Gittoes, Neil Hunter, Spencer Halliday, Rob Shaffer, Tom Proudlock, Dave MacKensie and myself with Matt Goddard and Frank “The Flying Dutchman” proving that speed is everything out on the wing.

The RATS have played an instrumental part in this last Bandits season. Unfortunately some have found the Bandits rigorous training regime far too much, and have decided at long last to hang up their boots. Well at least for the domestic fixtures! That said some of the keener members of the RATS outfit have worked their way effortlessly into the Bandits setup. Players like John Hickey, John “The Teenager Tormentor” Carr, John Stewart, John Lane, John Masters (Common theme here!), Dave Hinkins, Paul Lander, Dick Owsley, Mike Dicks, Kevin Rafter all making appearances. Homage must be paid to a few people who have helped out with the Bandits this season.

A big thanks to Ben Jordan for organising the fixtures and refs even though most don’t seem to like us or know much about the game! A massive thanks to Adam Brooks, John Hickey and Richard Pettenger for loads of last minute phone calls and re-organisation to help us get a team out. Not forgetting Steve White and Andy Hurd for looking after the team in my absence. After a well deserved summer break we’ll return next season to a new look side. The disbanded RATS and Bandits become one to form The Clifton RFC BRATS. A lively yet balanced mixture of young and old, providing the perfect platform to bring home the silverware, in the hotly contested South West 3rd Team Merit Table.

Ah, Peaceful Bristol . . .

2005-04-24T03:48:00.000-04:00

A week after my housemate's car was broken into via the window (which explains all the broken glass I see in the neighbourhood!) and I saw a burned out car in a 'dodgy' area of town, a proper football riot broke out in my neighbourhood.

The very lovely Memorial Stadium is just one street over from us, and is the home of Bristol Shoguns rugby. The Bristol Rovers football (ie. soccer) team shares the stadium with them, and, well, let's just say that your average football fan is a very 'interesting' person. Bristol appears to be a tough city and all of its 'hard gentlemen' seem to be football fans. (The most aggression I saw at a Shoguns match was when the ref neglected to send off Exeter's centre for his SECOND high tackle, and we chanted 'OFF, OFF, OFF!' to show our displeasure - civilized, really.) The following BBC account will shed some light on what happened at a Rover's football match yesterday, but I will set the scene by adding my small role in the fiasco.

I was returning from a First Aid course, and my bus was stopped in traffic for a good 10 minutes without moving only two blocks from my house. I saw a few football shirts walking away from the stadium so assumed a game had just been let out. But when I've left near-capacity matches at Memorial, we obeyed the traffic lights. Frustrated, I asked the bus driver if I could get out so I could walk home. As I crossed the street, I could see that there were police controlling the intersection - and no one was getting through. There wasn't a crowd crossing, however. I could also see a helicopter hovering over the neighbourhood - that wasn't a good sign. I could see a tactical van, which holds a whole bunch of officers and they were all deployed around the intersection. There as a big suburban, which must have belonged to a senior officer/supervisor and there was a lot of noise coming from the area of the stadium.

Unfortunately for me, that's where the excitment ends. I didn't think I'd be allowed (and I'm not stupid enough) to go have a look-see, but in some ways I wish I had, having read such incredible accounts of football violence as 'Among the Thugs' by Bill Buford (read it, if you like soccer at all). My housemate did see the dogs deployed and some mounted officers, but not much else. Having read the match report when I got home, one player from each side was sent off for violent conduct, and my other housemate assured us that opponents Swansea (she went to school there) were known for starting trouble. Anyway, just a bit of excitement for me, wish I could have seen more, but here's what the news had to say about it:

Arrests after football violence

Up to 150 people were involved in throwing missiles at police during violence after a football match. Five officers were injured in the disturbance on Saturday after the game between Bristol Rovers and Swansea.

Seven arrests were made after the trouble broke out in Gloucester Road in Bristol, following Rovers' 2-0 win over the Welsh side at the Memorial Stadium.

One man was arrested on suspicion of assaulting a police officer and six in connection with public order offences.

One officer received hospital treatment after suffering a minor head injury.

Supt Adrian Coombs, of Avon and Somerset Police, said the police operation for the match included the deployment of dogs, horses and the force helicopter.

courtesy: www.bbc.co.uk/bristol

Bristolian

2005-04-03T19:04:00.000-04:00

The Bristolian accent is truly its own in Britain. We've all heard the Cockney one, and I think North Americans tend to think it's the only other one outside of the 'posh' Oxbridge (ie. Oxford and Cambridge proper) accent. This country is absolutely full of different regional accents! Liverpudlians don't sound like the Beatles. Yorkshire people all sound like farmers to me. There is Geordie, Cornish, the south-of-London lisp . . . but Bristolian really makes me giggle, everytime I hear it. I tried earlier to describe it, and don't feel I can do it justice writing a description. My new revelation is that hard stresses in the middle of multi-syllable words aren't stressed at all . . . like when a mum is talkin' 'bout 'er thir-een year old daw-er. :)

You have to hear it for yourself. One of the best satirical examples (and also of the growing number of annoying young people here!) is the fabulous character Vicky Pollard from the hit comedy Little Britain. All I can say is look this up! I'm praying their dvds have reached Canada, because ones bought here don't work in our machines back home.

To give you a taste, this is a sample of writing from a true Bristolian creating a typical Vicky Pollard speech. See if you can the gist of how it sounds.

Sha-up, Yeah but, no but, yeah but, no but, nuffin to do wiv me, oive erd tis Atkins fawlt—or my god, oi doen believe it—Anyow, Atkins, "this fing wot yew knowz nuffin about", FOOTBALL…I’ve erd u get da nippers wot livs rown yur to git beyind da pastie fing an pee up in deair gurt hi like, u seez oo cun get de oyust like, den u getz da playurz to smak da ball eeven oiyur like, an oive erd rite-dat u getz yung Lizzie, gurt tart-- frum Orfeeld, to take da playurz trainin-yeah but-no but –yeah anywayz-shee getz um to go into da Co-Op like an getz um to nik alowd uv stuff like, an then, the tart skreemz er ed orf, she do, she skreemz er ed orf gurt tart, an da playurz right , da playurz av to leg it gurt fast like down fru Lockleaze like wivout getting cawt by the pleese,--truble iz royt, da playurz cassen run gurt fast like, oh my god oi down beleve dis—anyowz-aff da playurz like iz too nakurd to getaway, day getz cawt rite, then getz put away rite- then they dussen trane fur ages like, an das wy thame so slow like –yeah , rite, also rite, ive erd e getz yung Lizzie-gurt tart, to jog 10 miles wen itz gurt ot like, an getzer to wear 10 pearz uv nickurz witch iz so so not real like, cuz she gurt tart never warezum like-right , anyway, e getz ur to give ur nickurz all ot’n’sweaty like to da playurz, an you now wat right-oh my god I so don’t beleve dis---e getz um to sniff um and you know wat they dooze-they downt keepum—they givzem away-they givzem strate away and das wat they dooz wiv da ball, evry time they getz da ball-right-they finkz uv Lizzies sweaty nickz an givz it away-----

. . . I especially like the mention of Lockleaze and 'Orfeeld' (ie. Horfield), as it's my neighbourhood!!!

Not good, not bad, just different.

2005-03-31T17:02:00.000-05:00

So I've talked about what I like and what I dislike about England. What's different that doesn't fit into either of these categories? Let's see . . .

Cashiers at Supermarkets - They get to sit down! The main stores are Tescos, Asda, Sainsburys, and Somerfield. Cashiers at these stores have a very comfy, spring-loaded chair to sit on. What's also good for them (not so good for us, but I don't care) is that they don't bag your goods either. It may sound bad, but at least you make sure the right things are packed with each other (ie. no meats with veg, no eggs with cans, boxes together, etc.) and they won't go to the next person in line until you are finished bagging. If you can't, as I've seen with some old ladies, they're more than able to get someone to do it for you.

Doors Open Differently - I hope I'm right in saying this, but don't all shop doors open outward? I could be totally mad here, because I tend to pull every door here but almost all shop doors open inward.

Streets and Sidewalks - The streets are very narrow, meaning many people drive these dinky little cars that the men in my family (being gearheads, all of them) wouldn't be caught dead in. It also means people are parked half on the sidewalk sometimes, but the sidewalks themselves tend to be very wide. If you walk at all in Canada, you've probably got behind a couple walking shoulder to shoulder much slower than you. On most Bristol sidewalks, you can easily pass those slow-asses because they're wide enough for three people. The trouble is that you find more cyclists opting for the sidewalk because of the congestion on the streets.

Sales Taxes - This almost could be added to the good side, apart from that the VAT (value added tax) is 17.5%, but having that tax factored into every ticket price saves you from relying on your poor mathematical skills to figure out how much you'll really have to pay when you get to the check out counter . . . where the cashier is sitting down. :) I still have to figure out what and how I can claim some of these taxes back when I leave!

Stop Signs - I took me about a month to realize I hadn't seen a stop sign at all. I still don't think I've seen one. I'm fairly certain a double dash line at an intersection means stop. That said, the Brits love their roundabouts. If you've seen European Vacation, where Chevy Chase gets stuck in the 'traffic circle' for hours, that's what I'm talking about. They're every where. Some are decorated in the middle, some have tunnels so pedestrians don't have to navigate the traffic a la Frogger, and some are really just an intersection with a big white bump in the middle that you're supposed to go around. They do mean that there's more 'yeilding' than stopping, and I'm certain one of the main reasons for this has to do with the fact that practically every car has a standard transmission. If you've ever driven a stick, you know that coming to a full stop means going right down to first gear, and that tricky negotiation of clutch + gas pedal that can often lead to an embarassing stall out in the middle of an intersection. It's much better to roll into a roundabout or intersection, and if the traffic is clear, avoid the dead stop. That said, when you're walking and come to a lane with a car you always have to second guess whether or not the driver is going to let you go or plow you over. The stop lights themselves tend to be right at the line, so you can't creep up past it, and are 'blinkered' (ie. like a horse) so you can't see when the opposite lights are about to change so you can gun it. However, the change from red to green has a yellow flash in between so everyone knows when to clutch and pop into gear. Pretty cool, actually. Even works well for me, the cyclist.

. . . more to follow as I think of them.

New Additions to the Old Lexicon

2005-03-26T03:21:00.000-05:00

Recently, I was accused via MSN of having picked up a good amount of British words and phrases - I think it was Tyler? Anyway, I took stock and noticed that I actually haven't picked up many, but there are a few that are probably going to stick with me so don't 'take the mick' when I get back.

"Go on!" - Commonly yelled at sporting events to rouse on your team, this is very similar to our 'Come on.' I originally noticed it's brilliance when England's scrum half Matt Dawson would yell it on the fantastic sports quiz game 'A Question of Sport.' Though I don't say it that much, I will be saying it more than the latter as I tend to use 'come on' more to describe my disgust at something.

"Get stuck in." - Really relates to rugby, but simply means that you're going head first or head down into something and are going to put your all into it.

"Brilliant." - Used as an exclamation of sheer joy or simply to acknowledge thanks to someone who has just provided you with directions to the proper train platform, it's very versatile.

"Proper." - I picked up this word very quickly. Off the top of my head, I can't think of a Canadian equivalent in the way this word is used. I think it can be described as being used to accentuate that the thing you're talking about is truly genuine in your own eyes. Ex: "Let's take a drive into the country and get a meal at a proper English pub."

"Fit." - Direct equivalent to the North American usage of 'hot.' I have grown to dislike 'hot' over the past few years as it sounds more like a word teens would use. Beautiful is a very strong word for me, and cute leaves something to be desired, so if 'hot' is in the middle (and keeping in mind my dislike for the term), let's put 'fit' right there. If you need to hear how it's used, download 'Fit But You Know It' by The Streets.

"Leave it!" - A phrase which came in handy when teaching my little hellians, pleading with them to just forget the fact that their neighbour just took their pen or looked at them funny (man, I'm glad to be finished teaching). I think it comes from London, but it's a short expression, most often said with force rather than uttered quietly, to remind your 'mate' not to get involved with the brewing argy-bargy. Also used when you know someone is about to 'take the piss/mick/michael' (ie. make fun of you) to let them know you're onto them and don't want to hear their weak-ass joke.

"Mate." - What a great word this is to substitute for 'friend.' You add it into your sentences when speaking with people, and like how I described the standard greeting 'You alright?', it's another example of how friendly older people can be with each other. We don't commonly say things like: 'Hello, friend, do you want to go to the movies?' or 'Thanks a lot for that, friend, you saved me from that minger of a bird.' I guess we use 'man,' or 'buddy,' or 'dude,' but I think it's a little more formal than those, and can easily be applied to women as well as men.

The CBC

2005-03-20T13:19:00.000-05:00

Yes, I am a CBC-aholic. In describing my obsession to a friend and briefly outlining what's so wonderfully 'Canadian' about it, I came up with the perfect quote.

The CBC - honest, non-offensive, occasionally humourous, and generally boring.

So what's so good about it, then?

2005-03-16T06:46:00.000-05:00

I've been going on and on about what I dislike about this country, and though I haven't had the time or money to experience the really choice things yet (see 'The To-Do List'), there are some things here I find fantastic and wish I could either take back with me or that would exist in Canada. As I don't like banks in general, I have to admit, I love that UK banks don't charge 'user' fees - isn't enough that they can use our money to invest and get even richer? - on virtually any normal banking, and the only atms that have it are those little independent ones you find at gas stations and convenience stores.

The BBC
Even with 70-odd channels and a plethora of radio stations, I can still find many occasions to say "Nothing's on." That usually gets me reading more, but even when I read - call this a weird tendency - I prefer to have some background noise of some sort, and it can't be such that will just annoy me as useless and/or annoying things are emitting from the tv/radio. Even though we just get two BBC television stations (I think there are five altogether) and five or more radio stations, there always seems to be something worth watching on. I've found they have the ability to make shows that look at and sell antiques interesting. Hell, I'm excited at the prospects of being a contestant on 'Bargain Hunt' if it returns to the region. I sometimes find myself thinking, "I can't wait until my contract runs out so I can watch 'Ready, Steady, Cook' at 4pm." The radio stations seem to cover virtually everything, where even my beloved CBC only touches modern music at rare and inconvenient times, the Beeb has a station dedicated to it. I also don't think I can ever go back to watching Jeopardy again because the Beeb's quiz shows blow it away - in both extremes. With 'University Challenge' and 'Mastermind,' you would figure Ken whatshisname wouldn't even last the first round as the questions are so hard. With 'A Question of Sport,' Tim and Dave (if they knew more about soccer, etc) would be glued to the tube every Friday at 7pm - we should lobby for a North American version! And then there are the comedic ones, 'Nevermind the Buzzcocks' and '29 Minutes of Fame' that use the same format as 'A Question of Sport' (two regulars face each other, supported by their team of two celebrities), but really use the jokes to take the piss (ie. make fun of) other celebrities.

Food Prices
Yes, this is a more expensive place to live in, but there are many food products which I've been able to find cheaper here than at home. Nothing too glamourous, really, but somethings I buy a lot of here that would seriously dent my pocket change back home. Canned vegetables and fruit - great for cooking those big dishes like soups and desserts - are much cheaper. I use a lot of tomatoes, which at home would be about $1 a can, but are about 40 cents for a similar sized can. My other fav is peanuts. A 200g bag at home would cost maybe $2 or more, but here I am loving Tesco Value brand for about 50 cents a bag. I gather that a pricing war between the two 'value' markets, Asda and Tesco, has dropped prices more than what they might otherwise have wanted. I think the consumer doesn't mind all that much, really.

The Countryside
Despite the absence of trees, I can stare forever out my the window on my daily train ride to work. Rolling green hills, divided up nicely by hedgerows sets a scene ideal for any landscape artist to capture. If I drove, I might be annoyed, but as I don't I also find the narrow, winding, and often blinded by hedgerows roadways quite cool as well. Our grids might be easier when it comes to navigating, but in terms of aesthetics and character, I'll take the UK random ones.

Old Buildings
What are the oldest buildings you'll find in Canada? Maybe within the wall in Quebec City? Here, such buildings are either 'young' or at least 'contemporary.' Even though Bristol was bombed during WWII, you can still see many buildings downtown that look as though they could form the perfect backdrop for a Horatio Hornblower episode. Some are even older, dating back to the 1500s. One neighbourhood over from mine there is even a house with a thatched straw roof! Imagine seeing a wooden pallisade or a prairie sod as a liveable dwelling in modern Canada. Here, living in a 'Victorian' house is pretty standard, really.

The People
Though I have a healthy distaste for many young people, those in their mid-twenties and over seem to be pretty good. While working at Dovercourt in Ottawa, I came to dislike the 35-50 year old generation for their 'me first, blame everyone else' attitude. It doesn't seem to exist here. I also love the standard greeting of 'You alright?' The first time it was asked to me, I wondered if the person thought I looked ill or distraught. I was quite warmed by the fact that it's a common way of saying, 'What's up?' or 'How's it going?' as we do in Canada. Though I'm sure many don't realize the significance of the words, the fact that it shows concern for your mate probably hasn't been lost with over-use.

The Weather
Okay, it might rain more than I'm used to and I might experience more cloud than sun, but I have a few observations that I hope are true (esp. as I'm going to be cycling a lot from here on in) and might make impressions a lot better. It does rain, but rain never seems to come down hard or last very long. I remember showers in Canada coming down in buckets and lasting for hours on end. Here it tends to 'spit' or 'piss' - as the locals say - and as it seems to be windier than not, those small rain clouds get blown over in a matter of minutes. It's all about timing, really. One day at rugby training, the snow came down hard, turned to hail and everyone ran inside. After 10 minutes, it was blue sky and sunshine. This morning, at the bus stop, I unfortunately had to stand in 'spitting' rain, which became somewhat harder and driving at a good angle. But as I stood at the train station just 10mins away, the clouds were beginning to part and I could see a bit of sunshine. So if you can live with the idea that it won't last long, again I'm hoping I'm right here, the 'dreary' weather can become a little more bearable.

The Rugby
Of course, this was going to be here. I could talk forever, but I'll leave it brief. I love that the sport I adore is participated in and followed by so many people. Even if you don't play, or haven't played since you were 'wee,' people still remain fans of it. They sport team colours, know the star players, and the demand means that matches are on regular tv, and live - not on digital cable and at unsociable hours. The passion for the game means it's always easy to get people out to play and athletes you coach to take an interest in improving their abilities. I wish we could build such a 'rugby culture' in Canada. If you need any reason besides how cool the game is, there is no sport more social - where clubs will take you under their wing and support you to the best of their abilities, AND constantly invite you out for drinks - and the professional athletes remain humble and though make decent livings, do not enjoy rediculous salaries. You might see a pro driving a BMW, but bear in mind that his team is bound by a £2 million salary cap, meaning that all 30+ players' salaries and bonuses must fall under the $5 million dollar salary cap. What's that, the average salary for ONE decent NHL player?

Do you still have snow and no hockey?

2005-03-15T14:55:00.000-05:00

As I trickle down to my final month and a half here, I am really starting to crave/miss/better appreciate the things that we take for granted in Canada that I just can't find in the UK. Let's explore what they might be, shall we?

Decent Cookies
Yaz would be impressed that Hob Nobs are half the cost here (and I AM factoring in the exchange rate), but cookies seem to fall into several distinct categories. They are: rich tea, digestive, digestive with chocolate, ginger nut, custard cream, cocolate chip, and the kind with little raisins in them. They're all pretty basic. I have resorted to making due with chocolate digestive (pretty good, and cheap, actually), but there are a few types and brands I miss dearly.
Dave Nichol (no relation) could take over this country with his President's Choice brand! If I could pursade my mom to mail me a bag each of Decadant Chocolate Chip, Butter First Oatmeal, and those chocolate sandwich ones with chocolate cream in the middle and chocolate chips in the cookie part . . . what are those calleda again? What else? Oreos. Pirate Cookies. Mr. Christie and Dave Nichol could take this place by storm!

Donuts
We joke that Tim Horton's is a Canadian Institution worthy of heritage status, but I'm of the mind it really deserves it. Wait. Didn't they change the way they make donuts and raise the price? Scratch the previous statement. Think about the Timmy's from two years ago . . . Remember? Okay. Sweet. Donuts here consist of about four or five different varieties, the main one being plain jam filled with sugar on top. Not very exciting. I would kill for a sour cream glazed on some days. I even, quite pathetically, spent a good five minutes trying to explain what a Timbit was to a 'special' kid visiting the homework club that inhabits my classroom at lunchtime. Remember that commercial where the kid going to school in Edinburgh gets the Timmys care package from his folks? I don't drink coffee, but I could go for something like that.

. . . maybe the absence of these is why I continue to lose weight?

CANCON
There's something simple and honest about Canadian music and tv, but maybe that's what so great about us. Even if I were to temporarily put the desire to hear/see it on hold and want to get into BRITCON, it doesn't seem to exist here. When I flip on a radio - and I mean a rare decent one that plays music, not techno crap - I'm pained to hear more American songs than not. Thinking about the top UK bands right now, I'm sadly reminded of their preceeding American counterparts. What happened to Brit Pop? What about 80s New Wave? Is the British Invasion an easily forgotten memory? I would love to tune into local radio and hear a string of early Blur, The Smiths, and The Kinks. Even the BBC seems to want me to listen to Beyonce and Green Day. Thank god for CBC on-line, but I'm going to have to go DVD shopping when I get back to keep up with my 'Corner Gas.'

Reliable Public Transport
Even when buses are late in Ottawa, if you don't panic and know your alternate routes, you can walk a few blocks - or even just wait - and you can catch a suitable bus. Bristol is about the same size as Ottawa, and it could desperately use a Transitway or even a few routes that go straight. Think about having to get from St. Laurent to Nepean and only having the No. 18 as your only option. I really appreciate the ease of getting tickets and passes in Ottawa as well. I have to walk 20 minutes to get myself a bus pass for the week. You wouldn't believe how good the ticket/pass system is in Ottawa compared to the 'most people opt to pay cash' system popular here. It actually can make your bus several minutes late if there's four or five people at a bus stop - like my bus this morning, almost making me miss my train to work.

The Woods
Having grown up in 'rural Canada,' I can appreciate what is offered by a nice patch of trees. All kinds of animals abound in such an environment. Walking through them allows you to utilize all the knowledge stored up from watching those Hinterland Who's Who segments between CBC programs when you were a kid. (Cue that whistle . . . "The pilated woodpecker is indigenous to the Eastern Canadian woodlands and is destinguishable by the red tuft of feathers jutting outward from his head . . .") Trees offer such great uses as the sole source of heating fuel for my parent's home, delicious maple syrup, several varieties of cheaper home-grown fruit, and a place to build a little fort. I'm glad I'll be returning in spring as there's nothing like the sound of wind rushing through the trees on a warm sunny day. They also effectively block the wind when its at such a speed to make cycling hard or carry your penalty goals way off target. I don't know if this country ever had that many trees, but I wonder if it's subconscious longing that is influencing me to discover Wales in a region that is filled with forests?

Snow
As much as I complain about snow, it does have its useful moments. Snowballs, skiing, excuses for not going to school/work, beautifying the landscape, setting a truly festive scene at Christmas. I do love that rugby can be played for much longer here because there is no snow, but I don't know if I could live permanently in a country that doesn't really have four distinct seasons. I don't even know if you could say this country has proper seasons.

The Women
Thinking about women - as all men do, maybe I somewhat less offensively than most - I have to first say it's hard to suggest one country's women are better than the next. The UK is fairly cosmopolitan, but I think our multicultural society ensures Canada has a great mix of cute to beautiful women. We've got gorgeous women from the First Peoples to mixtures of traditional European immigrants to newcomers from all over the globe. I still haven't figured out what it is here - the poor diet, the drinking, the pale sickly complexion, or the tendency toward pop star fashion and makeup - but spotting 'fit birds' here is very much like finding a four-leaf clover in a field.
Now we're getting into territory that fits my particular taste in women, but I think Canada has a better selection of athletic natural beauties who don't need any form of enhancement to look good, and can even manage dressed for sport. Having worked in a school here, I wonder if its partially because women are seemingly encouraged to take part in more sports back home. I remember all the best looking girls at TLSS when I was a student were on the soccer, volleyball, touch football, basketball, and/or rugby teams. Girls here seem to be streamed into such 'sports' as field hockey and netball, with a scant few playing soccer. I would be prepared to argue that sports not only keep people fit, but give them a certain degree of self confidence that doesn't need to be masked or dressed up.

The To-Do List

2005-03-13T03:25:00.000-05:00

You've probably guessed I'm not your typical tourist. Though I can sometimes be found with a camera slung around my neck, that's about as far as I go toward portraying the stereotype of the North American tourist - at both extremes.

I definitely did not fly business class to get here, and am not limited by a one week vacation my firm on Bay Street has given me. I am not wearing anything made by Tilley Endurables, do not have seet of suitcases (seriously, can you carry all your goods in that? - I have a hockey bag!). I haven't spent days - and lots of cash - in London, and frankly don't plan on it. I also am not going to flock to the typical 'things to see in Britain' like Stonehenge, Edinburgh Castle, and Buckingham Palace. I want to see the real Britain, with my interests in mind.

I'm also not the typical twentysomething backpacker. As I'm not even carrying a backpack - though could really use my trusty MEC pack right now - and definitely don't have a maple leaf sewn on anything. Though my sense of Canadianness has been renewed while being here, I don't aim to be a standout backpacker. I don't have long hair and a beard; though I haven't had a haircut since Christmas, I do shave twice a week. I don't wear plaid, khaki shorts, with work socks and hiking boots. I have never spent the night in a hostel trying to play 'guess the accent' of everyone else trying to save a few bucks while thinking of the next tourist trap - be it popular or out-of-the-way - to go to.

I guess I fit somewhere in between. I have brought two bags worth of clothes, needed mostly because I've been teaching school for the past three weeks and hate wearing the same thing twice in one week. I have seen the sights of Bristol so far, but not much else. Having joined a rugby club, I pretty much fit into the life of a local. I work, I play a bit, I coach a bit, and watch as many games as I can. Once the job finishes at Easter, I will be trying to fill my last month and a half with things I have to do to make this a worthwhile visit. They are:

- Go to some pro games: Newport (Wales) vs. Munster (Ireland), Bath vs. Northampton (at the famous 'Rec' stadium), Gloucester vs. Saracens (at the ground affectionately called 'The Shed'). I've already been to some great matches and the atmosphere is indescribable, even to a rugby fan, if you haven't been.

- See the sights of Bath, a beautiful little town that dates back to Roman times, at least. Still has a Roman bath house, hence the name. Maybe do some canoeing while I'm there.

- Get into the Welsh countryside on a bike. Have found a town called Abergavenny, which has it's fair share of woodlands (yes, somewhat rare in the UK), rolling mountains, historic castles, and even a few pubs that offer accommodation. This trip should allow me tick off such wants as visiting an authentic country pub, seeing a few castles, and doing some mountain biking.

- Ride on a classic steam train. The Avon Valley Railway has an old train that runs down the beautiful Avon River Valley, and even offers a good meal for a decent price.

- Sail on The Matthew. This replica of John Cabot's 15th Century ship sits in Bristol harbour and takes nightly sails . . . soon, I hope. I feel I have a little connection with that boat and it's history, as it was the first (after the Norse, of course) to have reached Canada, and now I have made a return of sorts. I will definitely be adding a similar-looking ship to my collection of tattoos at some point.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Things I have done so far that just 'needed' to be done:

- Ate at a fish and chip shop.
- Visited a 'local' pub, and participated in a pub quiz. (was culturally biased, so I didn't do well)
- Been to all the museums and sites worth seeing in Bristol.
- Played rugby - am in demand as the only prop who regularly shows up!
- Coached rugby - boys are doing well, and don't need much coaching as they are naturals. What I've found, talking to higher level coaches, is that I'm not far off the mark from knowing all the latest strategies, tactics, theories.
- Had Indian takeaway. Curry seems to be an English national dish, along with fish and chips and pies.
- Managed to figure out how to get around the city, given that streets are not laid out in nice grids as in Canada.
- Voyaged by train. I had never been on a train until coming here, and take it everyday to work. I find it amazing that a half hour train ride, off peak hours, can be nearly the same price as a return trip on the bus around town. Frankly busses are priced way to high here.
- Worked at a school. If ever I was in doubt about teaching (see previous article), I am more convinced it's not for me. The system is crap, and the kids are worse. :)

Declaration of Independence . . . Two?

2005-03-03T16:04:00.000-05:00

Whose big idea was it to include Gr. 7 and 8 in the UK secondary school system? In teacher's college I swore I would never teach them an in my maternity cover job here in England, I teach 8 different groups of them!!!

If you're confused - as I was the first few days - they have a different class rotation sytem. I teach 15 different groups of kids! Yes, you heard it. Some I only see twice a week - which is a good thing, believe me - and just a handful of lessons can last me a long time, so it does have it's good points.

That said, I'm not really happy with school teaching. If I haven't griped about it to you, here it is. I don't think I'll return to teaching school at all. I just don't fit in with all the rules, the system, the politics. I just want to share my passion for l'histoire. Here's to my attempt to become a professor of History. I bet most of you just thought, 'Hey, he'll be good at that.' I think so too. Thanks. Enough on that issue. School should start for me in September, back at good old Carleton U . . . now I have to brush up on that anti-Ottawa U song . . .

So, I should finish my post just before Easter and have already told the respective parties I won't be returning. Then it's a month and a half of really getting out and seeing this country. I hope to get tickets to games at Bath and Gloucester/Leicester. Want to see our ladies make a nice run for the English Premier title. I want to do some cycling through the Welsh countryside. I want to sail on the Matthew. I'm told I should get down to Salisbury and Plymouth as well. We'll see if I have the cash for that.

Early May, I intend to jet back to the Little O and spend some time with the fan-damily. If anyone wants to do some May canoeing through the Washago-Sebright-Rama triangle, let me know as I'll be just bumming it around. I also want to do some rugby clinics for the Orillia schools, and if any of you want to volunteer to help, let me know!

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I have just encountered a fantastic band called The Lost Patrol. Great pop rock from two of Sweden's young stars, Dennis Lyxzen (from Refused and International Noise Conspiracy) and Lisa Miskovsky (solo artist). You can check out their songs and a pretty fun video on www.burningheart.com - Sweden has some great bands you should really check out. For the punks, Bombshell Rocks, Millencolin, International Noise Conspiracy and for the good old rock, Division of Laura Lee, Soundtrack of Our Lives, and the Sahara Hotnights (featuring two of my top five musician crushes, singer/guitarist Maria Andersson and drummer Josephine Forsman . . . sigh . . . ).

What's with all the rugby?

2005-02-20T13:58:00.000-05:00

If you visit this page frequently, or this is your first time (if so, shame on you), and you know me well, you're probably wondering when I was going to get to the rugby?

Well, sit back and relax. Grab a drink and a snack. Lean back in your chair. Pull the mouse a bit closer so you can scroll down, because this is going to be a long one.

When the woman at the passport clearance gate at Heathrow asked why I was making this trip, I proudly declared that I was here for a bit of a rugby tour. Was I here to find permanent work? Hell no, I hate traditional work. She didn't seem too impressed. She must be a footy fan, or maybe goes for tennis?

Even people here ask why I came to Bristol, my consistent reaction being the thought that there's sometime completely wrong with this city that everyone knows about and I haven't discovered it yet. Maybe they don't take much pride in their home town? Who knows? By all accounts, however, the south-west ranks right up there for the quality of rugby with south Wales, and the Midlands. Bristol is situated nicely between Wales, Gloucester, and Bath - all known for their rugby traditions. Apparently if you head down to Cornwall, despite its sparse population, the rugby is even better!

I probably mentioned that I belong to Clifton RFC, the seventh oldest club in Britain - and almost as old as the Dominion of Canada itself - having been founded in 1872. Our men's first team are chasing promotion to the Nationwide League, sitting comfortably near the top of South West 1. Our ladies are second in the English Premiership, with no less than 16 current/former England and Wales internationals. Our boys squads are chock full of talent from across the region, not to mention lads from the prestigious 'rugby school' of Colston's Collegiate. With that in mind, you might have guessed that many teams see us as 'posh' and effectively hate us. I am helping coach a fantastically gifted group of boys at the U15 level, and as of yesterday starting playing for the club's 4th side. As the only prop who has promised to show up regularly, I am seen as quite valuable to the team - despite playing like crap after having lost upwards of 60-70lbs since 2003 and being unable to handle myself effectively in a scrum anymore. (If I haven't said it to you before, I hearby declare to become a centre by next year's season!)

My first 'UK' match was to see England v. Wales women in Cardiff on Feb. 4th. England ran riot, beating the Welshies 81-0. I learned from England blindside flank, and Clifton captain Shannon Baker that our club has half a team's worth of Welsh internationals who have decided to 'retire,' but could have made the result a whole lot closer. I was but a month here, and already began to miss Canada, seeing all those girls and women having a good time with rugby reminded me of my own fantastic girls back home with Carleton and The Coven (miss ya, ladies!). It also reminded me why I loved this side of the game so much. Aside from a few smart-ass comments from drunken guys (more at the Varsity match then a women's international), it was a lot more harmonious and welcoming than any guy's match I've watched.

Even the 'stars' of the national teams seem very humble. Even before I met the amazing Ms. Baker, I submit the following examples to show how 'together' the women's side of the game is (submit lesbian joke here, if you dare). First off, they had no one but little girls running as 'ball boys' along the touchlines and they were very cute in doing so. One proud set of parents stood by me along the fence and constantly took pictures of the game - not of the players or action - but of their daughter in the foreground of it all. To show that connectivity, there were girls and women there of all levels supporting their national heroines. The rugby unions seem to have breaks for general league play when internationals are on, and judging by the amount of players in the crowd (not the typical parents, friends, and boyfriends/girlfriends you see at average games) it's a fantastic strategy for promoting the game and letting talented youngsters get a taste of what they can aspire to achieve. At many points in the game, players were acknowledging the personal cheers they got from friends, family, and supporters with a smile and a wave. By far, my favourite example was when a tiny ball girl slowly but surely walked it over to England's dominant hooker Selena Rudge, and unlike footballers and most rugby players, she was actually patient with the child who was probably very nervous. (Take note next time how impatient guys are with ball boys, and oftentimes downright rude.) Selena evenhighlighted the moment by bending down to accept the ball, becoming less 'dominant' if you know anything about body language, smile and even said thank you! If I were that kid, I would have just found a new heroine.

On Wednesday, I was priviledged to have witnessed the spectacle that is a Varsity Match. 'Varstiy' refers to a match in any sport between two rival universities. In Bristol we have Bristol University and the University of the West of England (UWE - which I live by, and didn't figure out that it can be said as 'you-we.' How clever is that?). Both women and men met before 3000 fans on a very cold, but fully enjoyable evening of rugby. The women's game was kind of slow, and it might impress my girls to let them know they would have smashed both schools, but it was very close and therefore had an exciting finish. The men's game was very passionate and hard-hitting. It, too, was a close match. Aside from the on-field action, the true essence of these games came from the supporters.

- Most of the crowd were in their late teens and twenties, and a good amount were enjoying their alcohol, so you can imagine the spirit.
- Each school seemed to have a commentator who offered biased updates and occasional rallying calls. The 'best' (but kinda shameful) one was, 'Let's here it for the first fight of the match!' Crowd: 'Woooo!'
- The taunts were of good football class and sought to undermine the opposition, and sometimes individuals. The best one, from the dominating Bristol U crowd: 'Can we play you every week?' (sung over and over, suggesting UWE was so bad that playing them was good for securing league points)
- I wasn't impressed to see Bristol U cheerleaders, thinking that could only be a North American phenomenon. I guess I have to respect them as athletes, too, but didn't feel it was the type of thing to be seen in rugby. It seemed I wasn't alone. A guy in a gorilla suit and a UWE t-shirt ran among them and mimicked their moves until a steward came and told him to take a hike . . . and that's where it got 'weird' . . .
. . . On the far side of the field, a cow and a dog mascot began a terrible game of rugby. They seemed to have nothing to do with anything. . .
- Then the streakers came on. It was below five degrees, so I don't think anyone was too shocked that they kept their underwear on as they danced through the ranks of cheerleaders (who, keep in mind, seemed to have invited some elementary school girls to dance with them for the evening). Then the underwear came off. Both very brave men ran over to the mascots and stole their ball. Then the ran back across the field, splitting up. One dove over the try line, obviously disregarding the fact his junk was going to drag along the cold, muddy turf. The other ran over to the previously dejected man in the gorilla suit and full on tackled him. Then the two streakers escaped out the back side. If this had been a semi-pro or pro game, they would have been caught ages ago and probably charged. Not so at a uni match, it seems. It was by-far the funniest 'half time show' I've ever seen. You couldn't write better comedy into a movie. Critics would have called it 'unrealistic' but as the old saying goes: 'Truth IS stranger than fiction.'

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I am hoping to get one of the last spots on our club's U17 tour to Ireland at Easter, and aspire to see a couple of Premiership games, so I'll let you know what those are all about. Figuring out that rugby effectively ends mid-May, and realizing I'm scheduled to be here until the end of June, I really got to thinking 'what's the point?' So, with confirmation yet to be made, I'm hoping to come back to the Little O for the middle of May, do some clinics for the schools there, and head back to the Big O for the summertime.

"No man has ever cried during this movie. They just had something stuck in their eye."

2005-02-15T10:30:00.000-05:00

The above quote was so poignantly quipped after a brief tribute to the movie 'Shane' starring Alan Ladd. It was just one of many such revisions of The Top 100 Greatest Tearjerkers, as presented by Britain's Channel 4 this past Sunday. I'll bet you're immediately thinking about your top 10 . . . and before I get to my comments, I'll give you their final ten.

10. My Girl - Haven't seen it.
9. Field of Dreams - Okay, sees the dad he never got to say goodbye too and plays baseball with him. Not I, but I bet Tim cried at this one.
8. The Champ - Haven't seen it. Their clip didn't get me.
7. Shawshank Redemption - All of the end, with Morgan Freeman's narration. Wow.
6. Bambi - didn't get me at all. See 'The Snowman.'
5. Ghost - geez, never seen it, never will.
4. It's a Wonderful Life - You wish you weren't born, get to see alternative, you DO make a difference, AND get a second chance. Yeah, that's pretty powerful.
3. Titanic - still boycotting it.
2. The Green Mile - sadly haven't seen it.
1. ET - nah

So, the website for the programme's list has a brief addition asking 'What makes men cry?' When you see the list of tearjerkers (personally, I don't 'cry' . . . ya know?), maybe it'll shed some light on what gets us guys to well up and feel for just a brief moment. If you catch us, please don't make a big deal. Just say 'aww,' smile, and don't bother with any tissues because we're trying so damn hard to hold it in that not much is coming out anyway. Quite appropriately, Kleenex has a new brand of 'man sized' tissues on sale here and they acted as sponsors.

Here are the films and tv episodes that got to me, and upon repeat still might. Let's just say I'm glad I watched this show alone.

Shane - where this list began for me. It was pretty high on the list, but probably because you not only have to be a man, but also into westerns to feel it as well. Drifter helps family overcome bad guys, kid loves the man (over his father, but then realizes dad is cool too), but he's shot at the end and leaves on his horse. Kid runs after, crying and saying 'Come back, Shane. Come back!' . . . . does he die on his horse or doesn't he?

To Kill a Mockingbird - When the black man is wrongly convicted of rape, and Atticus (his lawyer) is the last to leave the floor, the gallery of black citizens stands. His kids wonder why, and the priest says, "Because your father is leaving the room." (jeez, I just got dust in my eye...hold on)

Saving Private Ryan - What, you say? Yep. Two scenes, actually. The first is where his mom gets news that all but one of her boys is dead, cleverly done without them actually saying it and mom collapsing on the porch as you see a picture of her boys on the table in the hall. The second at the end when the old man asks if the effort was worth it, was his life worth the lives of those men. (there I go again, I had better dust in here sometime)

Casablanca - Bogey's speech to Ingrid Bergman (hottest actress of the 30s/40s, I do declare) at the end.

Spartacus - Romans offer freedom to all the slaves if Spartacus reveals himself. Tony Curtis stands up before Kirk Douglas and declares: "I'm Spartacus!" . . . and slowly everyone does. They all get crucified along the Appian Way. Now that's brotherhood!

Shindler's List - When all the real survivors lay a stone on Oscar Shindler's grave at the end.

Dead Poet's Society - After Robin Williams gets canned, and the boys stand on their desks to show their respect for him.

Stand By Me - Gordy and Chris sharing their problems by the campfire. Kids can feel too.

Forrest Gump - At Jenny's grave at the end.

Glory - When Morgan Freeman flips on Denzel Washington for all his hatred toward his own people.

Blackadder - This was pretty high on their list, actually. Yes, it was a comedy. Yes, it did get oddly serious at the of the last episode of the series. As Richard Curtis (the author, and also of Four Weddings and a Funeral and Love Actually - both on the list as well) put it, for the first time, faced with finally having to go 'over the top' and to their certain deaths, the four main characters actually express serious feelings and reservations. The slow, operatic rendition of the usual comedic theme song also adds to the mood. . . . which leads me to my next submission . . .

The Snowman - Has anyone seen this cartoon? Basically the British version of 'Frosty,' with no words just music. Predictably, the boy loves the snowman but is saddened when he melts away. As the director put, watch the movie without sound and it's crap. Watch it with the brilliant score, and it's pass the tissue box. Lesson #1: Music plays a huge factor in tearjerkers.

MASH - several occasions, and why I think it's the greatest comedy of all time, brilliantly mixing humour and social commentary. One scene in particular: An old former Korean calvary officer steals Potter's horse. He's now very poor, and I think they had to kill his horse for food ages ago. Potter reluctantly lets it go as it finally gives the old man some pride. The next day his daughter brings it back. He died that evening, but happy to have gone with dignity restored. Man, that one gets me everytime . . .

Magnum PI - Vastly underrated 80s tv show. In an episode where he is lost at sea, and forced to tread water, he uses memories of his father and their swimming lessons together to keep him going. The flashbacks also include his coping with his father being away in the Korean War. In a series of scenes where he is near the end of his strength and thinking about the time he just had to hold on (both for a long tread, and on the day his dad was due to come home), the two come to a massive climax. As his friends finally find him, the flashbacks show a man in a navy officer's suit coming to the beach . . . only to be another officer to tell he and his mom that his dad had been killed the day before he was due to return.

50 First Dates - Saw this last night. My housemate was a wreck, and I had the sniffles (admittedly not cold-related). I couldn't believe Adam Sandler could do it, but for a man to go through the effort of making his girlfriend/wife fall in love with him every day - that's dedication!

Life is Beautiful - Pretty much everytime you put together that Banini's explanation of the rules of 'the game' to his son was to spare him from the fear of being in a concentration camp, and that they'll probably die. If you haven't seen it, watch it!

. . . and finally, the one that will actually force tears to flow if I'm at home alone watching it.

The Killing Fields - You have to watch this, but when the reporters finally figure that they're not going to create a fake passport for Dith Pran to escape certain death from the Khmer Rouge, there's obviously a lot of tears. When the Brit snaps on Sidney for not letting him go sooner, and Dith Pran tearfully interjects that HE knew the consequences and wanted to stay with his friend, it gets more intense. It further intensifies when he's walking away in the rain and they're powerless to do anything, oh, and with him asking Sidney to take care of his wife and kids and to say that he loves her. Then the show did something that made it even worse for me when they cut right to the final scene when they finally meet up after two years of escape and evasion, and there are no grudges, just friendship and relief. Wow . . . wow. Oh, and it's a TRUE STORY!

Well, there you have it. Some of the greatest tearjerkers from the eyes of a man. Draw your own conclusions based on what types of things can get us to well-up (the CH 4 list included several sporting moments too), but I'm just glad we're in a time when it's okay to express such emotions and show that we're not totally cold. Power to the people involved, as well, for sparking such emotions in us!

Singing Homesick Blues - Part Two

2005-02-02T10:06:00.000-05:00

Has anyone ever heard the phrase, "Separated by a common language"? It probably doesn't come to a shock to you that the Brits have different slang words, but there seem to be more and more things we pronounce differently. If we both speak English with a variety of accents, should words be said differently with the stress on the wrong syllables, using the wrong version of the vowell - oh, and adding in extra syllables!?!?

Here are some examples off the top of my head:

Migraine - Pronounced 'mee-grain.' I might give this one as I seem to remember some (possibly bogus, cuz English is pretty fucked) rule that if there was a consonant between two vowels, the first vowel made it's proper long sound. Wait, wouldn't that make it 'mih-graine?' (see 'vitamins' below)

Tomato - You've heard the old crooner song, and I know you wondered, "Who the fuck says 'toe-mah-toe' anyway?" Well, it's the Brits (and Aussies too, I think). Um, speaking for my favourite food, it's 'toe-may-toe' people!

Vitamins - Pronounced 'vih-ta-mins.' Not sure if that came accross okay, so to compare, we say 'vi-ta-mins' with the 'i' sounding like 'eye' - the way it was meant to be.

Orientated - The first in the extra-syllable category. I do believe the word is simply 'orient,' as in "I'm going to use this compass to orient ourselves in relation to this map." If the word is orientated, then the present tense must be orientate. Do you use this word? I sure as hell don't! Having just looked it up, both seem acceptable. Damn! You win this time, British.

Aluminium - Note that little extra 'i' that makes this word sound oh-so-different. You know this was started prior to the advent of spell check and some unfortunate UK dictionary company created pandemic, annoying language shift. Miriam-Webster says the root word is 'alumina,' so I'd chalk that one up to the colonials!

One word I really have to watch out for is 'pants.' That word doesn't refer to what you wear on your legs, on the outside, but what's underneath! 'Pants' are under pants, and the longer, more socially-acceptable outerware version are called 'trousers.' Jeez . . .

You know that whole 'we say fries, they say chips' thing? Some say it's confusing, but I think both of our versions make sense. The potato thins we get at the corner store are called 'chips' and the potato wedges that go well with burgers are called 'fries.' Here they are 'crisps' and 'chips' respectively. Fair enough. What I don't get is why the Aussies call them both 'chips.' That's just stupid. I should clear that one is 'chips' and the other are 'hot chips,' but I still think it's rediculous.

. . . now maybe we're the ones who are wrong, but having the typical Canadian 'small man' syndrome, I like to think we're in the right. :)

One thing that's true about this country is the mixture of accents. If you're at all interested, check out www.bbc.co.uk/voices . They are trying to build a map of UK accents, which I think is very cool. Sean Connery Scottish seems to be the most liked, and David Beckham's seemed to be the least liked (but there are other candidates for sure!). I'd have to agree with the Scottish. Watching a university quiz show, I absolutely fell in love with a girl from U Edinburgh because of her accent. It makes me think I've chosen the wrong spot to live, in a sense. While Bristol is a city of many different people from all over the UK and abroad, the Bristolian accent is a major turn-off. You can have the sight of a beautiful girl in the distance totally destroyed if, upon closer contact, you discover she has a local accent. . . . ugh, I shudder just to think of it.

It is kind of cool to hear all the different variations of the 'British' accent in such a small area. Scottish can be soft and lyrical, or very vulgar. Welsh tends to roll and invite you in. South of London, there seems to be a natural lisp . . . or should I say 'souf' of London? To me, northerners up by Cumbria and Newcastle (Geordies) sound a bit like Scots, but they'd deny it. Yorkshire is supposed to have a very distinct one, but I'm still trying to pick it out. My goal before leaving is to get the Bristolian one down, so I can annoy you with low 'low brow' I think it sounds. :) Oh, and I don't like the Aussie accent, either!

Get in touch with Canadian culture, people!

2005-01-28T05:40:00.000-05:00

I'm sitting at a computer in my little house in Bristol, listening to a cheesy 'oldies' station from Cardiff, Wales (most modern stations here are infested with dance music!). This isn't the first time I've heard his name mentioned here, but when they introduced a song by Michael Buble (boob-lay) and talked at length of his genius, I got a little angered.

I didn't get angered because many Brits seemed to have embraced him, but because I'll bet that most Canadians haven't even heard of him! The velvety-voiced crooner is Canadian, people! I was first introduced to him last year by my beloved Jazz 91.1 in Toronto. He was singing a Sinatra song, but I wondered if it was a very young Chairman of the Board because his voice didn't seem to have the usual traces of prolonged smoke and drink. I was so impressed by this new boy, and more so that he is one of ours!

Listening to him just now, I had to think why isn't he a superstar in Canada? We all do it as most of us listen to commercial music, and even for the indies among us, looking 'south' to find our listening pleasure. Keep those favourite bands close, but don't forget to look closer to home for great listening too!

I'm claiming Michael Buble (check out his site at www.michaelbuble.com ) as my Discovery of Something/one Canadian. I put out the challenge for you to do so as well, and leave it in my comments section for all to see and discover for themselves.

Singing Homesick Blues - Part One

2005-01-22T13:59:00.000-05:00

Okay, I'm not really homesick, it's great here. If you've known me for a long time, or even a short time, you've probably heard me sing the praises of the UK. Now that I'm here, those things are definitely great to experience, but I get the feeling that I'm missing a very large element. Let x = "what's good about Canada." Seriously, there are things about Canada I miss and I unfortunately (fortunately?) just read a whole list of more things.

First off, I miss the CBC. The CBC has something, I believe, for every Canadian. If you think Radio One and/or Two are just for old, boring people, you need to check out Radio 3. Okay, it's on Saturday nights from about 7pm until really early in the morning, and that obviously cuts into prime pre-drinking, drinking, and partying time. If you have a bunch of intellectual or at least open-minded friends, put it on instead of that mix cd we've all heard twenty times. Ask the cabbie to put it on for a few minutes on you way to On Tap. Without many (any?) friends left in Orillia, I spent New Year's Eve listening to it and being with that 'old friend' made me feel a little bit less of a loser.

I guess I should stop talking so much about it, and tell you what's on it. Hosted by Grant Lawrence (former lead of BC punk legends, The Smugglers), it features the best of Canadian indie music of all kinds, and many stories about ordinary people. I think twice during the evening, maybe at 9 and 10, definitely at ten, they have uninterrupted coverage of a live concerty by your favourite indie band. I even found you can record it you have digital cable/satellite if you plug a tape in the vcr and record the blank screen for the music. (Sure, there's got to be a better way - just read about Podcasting? - but I'm not that technically brilliant.)

If none of that is for you, check out www.cbcradio3.com. It's a beautiful zine full of all kinds of interesting articles. This week has their 100th issue and has one hundred topics that are typically Canadian. That has brought about some longings for home, and this latest entry. I'm loving it here now, but will be glad to get back home in July.

. . . what's cool about the UK?
- The Beeb quiz shows. That one where the universities go against each other and is way harder than Jeopardy. The one with the famous Brits 'taking the piss' out of other famous Brits. A Question of Sport (Tim, it's all SPORTS trivia!!!) played by pro athletes, and Never Mind the Buzzcocks (yes, where two of your team mates are two of the four members of the former punk band).
- Cheap cookies and chocolate. Yaz, Hobnobs are half the price of Canadian ones - and I AM factoring the exchange rate.
- Rugby. My club was formed in 1876 (fifth oldest, I'm told), and has a covered grandstand and five fields. What Canadian team can bost that?
- The History. Man, there's so much I'll never see.
- The weather. Despite the rain (which has mostly been drizzle, so not as bad as Canadian downpours), I like it being +10 in January. In the summer, it won't get above 30.

. . . what don't I like about the UK?
- Plastic women. They're everywhere. Ugly, with too much makeup and odd fashion choices. The women aren't as generally good looking as Canadian women, but there are the odd 'stunners' who peak out every now and then.
- Chavs and lads. Don't ask for a huge explanation, but let's just say there's a generation of young men here who are completely insane in their drinking and seemingly constant desire to look and act like idiots.
- Faux Hawks. They're everywhere, and they even seem to be socially acceptable in business jobs. (To add to men's fashion as a dislike, what's with the tight trousers, boys? ugghhh)
- The costs. Everything is so bloody expensive and I'm not even near London!
- The weather. Constant threat of rain. To quote Lewis Black: "It was the greyest day I had ever seen. The next day it was GREYER!"

Take care, and check out that CBC link!!!

Welcome to the UK

2005-01-19T17:55:00.000-05:00

So, I'm here. It's often cloudy and rain always seems to be a threat, but we haven't got any torrential down-pours. The temp is always around 10 degrees, so practically shorts weather. The wind can be a bit strong and there's still lots of green grass. Why am I talking about the weather when I hate pointless chat about the climate? . . . because it's not Canadian Jan-Feb weather, and I love it!!!

I won't get too much into small details about my trip, but to keep you up to date on day one to yesterday . . . I dislike flying, almost puked on touchdown in Heathrow because of the turbulence. I dislike most kids, having taught at what I later learned was a 'difficult school' on supply. The 'alternative' job hunt begins tomorrow. Fingers crossed, I'll be working at the Bristol City Museum soon.

The rugby hasn't quite begun yet, but I'm becoming known about Clifton RFC as 'the Canadian chap' and the nice part-time bar lady (full time nurse) is happy to introduce me to everyone while I'm sitting around with a pint of water watching sports on Sky cable. I will officially be working with the U15 boys, who are pretty great, having demolished Bath when I watched them for the first time (note that Bath is THE 'Bath,' meaning the boys are understudies to the professional club and wear club ties and jerseys and pullovers - and our boys destroyed them). It's kinda daunting here as they're so much better than us - and they don't train half as much! Our boys only come out for rugby one day a week - Sunday. If there's a game, that's it. If not, they train. One day. Such skill. Wow. They even look at the three days we do at Carleton as 'a bit much,' and figure it's no wonder student-athletes are burned out when the Varsity university teams in Canada practice every day. I guess I've learned my first rugby lesson here. I won't burn the girls out in September.

This weekend, I get to see the ladies play - currently top of the UK premier table. There are no less than 8 current England and Wales internationals in the first team. They are playing no. 2 Wasps, who also have a high amount of internationals from England, Wales and Canada. It's going to be massive. It's my hope that I get to meet some of the girls, get some insight on women's rugby to add to my knowledge, and even become friends with them. I've been asked to play for the fourth (ie. we-don't-train-we're-the-social) team, otherwise known as the Bandits. I've managed to strain my achilles tendon, so probably won't for a while, if at all. The girl who owns the house wants me to so she can meet some 'fit boys.'

I'll leave what will probably be the first of many comparisons between Canada and the UK. It's been just over a week so far, and I dearly miss the fine people and structure at OCTranspo in Ottawa!

Aside from the surprisingly-decent free newspaper that comes with riding the bus, they're pretty much crap. The schedules are kind of hard to figure out, not like it makes a difference, as the drivers are NEVER on time anyway. It costs an arm and a leg at £2.80 for a return trip (ie. probably more than $6 CDN). My weekly pass costs over $35, and a month pass is probably around $120. Unlike Canada, the bus drivers actually take bills and give back change, but what sux about this is when there's a line of people who are all doing this and now you're five minutes late - like on my first day working supply (and I was already 20 mins late because I was given false information on what bus I could take). There aren't really that many buses, probably because seemingly everyone has one of those little toy-like cars Brits drive - picture a Pontiac Sunfire being a medium-large size car - and the plethora of insane motor scooter drivers who weave in and out of traffic. Hopefully I'll land a long-term job soon and be able to get the beautiful Saracen bike I saw at a shop down the street and I can put that all behind me . . . .

Missing you all lots and actually looking forward to a return in June/July!

Top Five Albums

2004-12-17T16:31:00.000-05:00

. . . not just bands, but albums where you never feel like pressing the skip button, ever. Though they rank with my top fav. bands, I appreciate these specific albums for not having each song sound the same.

1. The Verve - "Urban Hymns"

2. The Clash - "London Calling"

3. Jimmy Eat World - "Clarity"

4. The Specials - "The Specials"

5. At the Drive-In - "Relationship of Command"

Top Five Books

2004-12-16T23:25:00.000-05:00

Again, a tough category that I might end up feeling regret over. Despite having a massive library for a person my age, and belonging to a book club (YES, it's true!) where I can select from the best of military literature, I rarely read books twice over. Let's try, in no particular order . . .

1. Once Were Warriors - Alan Duff. This book looks at life in the ghetto of South Auckland, and features a broken home of Maori people, and their community. Wow. What a powerful story. It did not have anything too fantastic in it, but you get the impression that this is real, and from all accounts, countless people go through similar realities every day. I have a deep respect for the world's aboriginal people, many having lost the essence of their culture from colonialism, and generations of troubles, but recently there has been hope and a turn for the better. This book hits you in the face with the harsh realities, but warms your heart to the possibilities in the end.

2. Panzer Commander - Hans von Luck. The memoires of a German Army officer during World War Two, this book gives insight to a small reality of that period's history in that not everyone on the side of the 'enemy' was evil. You probably didn't know the difference between Wehrmacht and The Schultzstaffle (ie. S.S.), that some in the Wehrmacht plotted Hitler's downfall/assassination, and that many fought only for patriotism and not for the Nazi party. The book is not an apology or a pleading explanation, but one man's truth. His stories show episodes of the war not in history books; agreements with the British where they wouldn't fight during the sweltering daytime African heat, hanging out in coffee shops with French friends who he was sure were Resistance fighters but never asked, the trials and tribulations of being involved with a woman who was part Jewish, the horrors of almost disappearing in the Russian prison system forever, and finally (even tear jerkingly) describing his thoughts upon sharing his experiences with modern-day Jewish students. It's one of the best military memoires I've ever read.

3. Catch-22 - Joseph Heller. I haven't read it in ages, but I haven't read a book more funny and absurd, with such an amazing cast of equally-funny and absurd characters.

4. Last of the Mohicans - James Fenimore Cooper. Another I haven't read in ages, but the 1800s language lends very nicely to the descriptions of North American woodland beauty that, coming from where I come from, I connect very deeply with.

5. Lord of the Rings - J.R.R. Tolkein. Did this man have enough free time on his hands? Apparently so, if you could create not only a wonder, lengthy, timeless story, but also the world they live in, its complete history, and a language for its greatest beings. Tolkein essentially begat a genre (Fantasy) of his own with his books, which also managed to satisfy readers of all ages; a rare feat in any literary period.

Two-for-One Top Fives

2004-12-15T22:31:00.000-05:00

The last few days have been so busy and it seems I am two steps from being 'set' for England, only the big things being Visa and Plane Ticket. They are kinda flexible, and not as crucial as dealing with my accommodations, which are taken care of I am glad to say.

Anyway, two more Top Five lists, for anyone who was disappointed not to see one yesterday.

Top Five Dogs
1. German Shepherd
2. Golden Lab
3. Huskey
4. Bull dog (or whatever Churchill had)
5. Jack Russell Terrier

Top Five Cartoons
1. Tintin - Great adaptation of the books. I was a teenager when this came on tv in Canada, and never missed an episode.
2. Bugs Bunny - The classic. Where it all began. No one but Bugs Bunny can pull off the arrogant, cocky bastard routine and still be loveable!
3. Eek the Cat - Satirical kids show? Yep, done good too.
4. The Raccoons - Come on, you all saw it and you all still think Bert is the coolest! Good morals, nice characters who sought to do right, played hockey, and lived in the woods - how Canadian is that?
5. Robotech - Anime from the 80s, seems like I'm the only one who's ever seen it. Brilliant stories!

Top Five Films

2004-12-13T09:31:00.000-05:00

This one is going to be tough . . . don't be surprised if you notice it edited later.

1. Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrells - not a Citizen Kane or a Casablanca, but definitely a film deserving of praise based on its fantastic characters, its carefully spun plot, and the brilliantly re-quoteable dialogue. Most of have seen "Snatch" because of Brat Pitt, but go back one more film and see "Lock Stock" because it's so much better.

2. A Bridge Too Far - The Yanks and Brits attempt the largest airborne assault on three cities in the Netherlands in the fall of 1944, and well, go a bit too far. Nice attempt to try and end the war earlier, boys, but sometimes egos, ambition, and bad luck get in the way. I love war movies that actually cover a real story and don't try and sensationalize the action/drama. What's also cool about this film is the cast. With this, and the other war film based on a Cornelius Ryan book (The Longest Day), you're getting around fifteen of the biggest actors/actresses of the day - and not just a brief 20 second cameo . . . you know we'll never see that again. Though most you'd only know if you've watched older films, many you'd recognize by face if not by name. Let me name-drop:
- Americans: James Caan, Ryan O'Neal, Elliot Gould, Gene Hackman (plays Polish general), Robert Redford, John Ratzenberger (ie. Cliff from 'Cheers' - he dies)
- British: Dirk Bogarde, Edward Fox, Anthony Hopkins, Michael Caine, Sean Connery, Laurence Olivier (Dutch doctor),
- Germans: Hardy Kruger, Maximilian Schell

3. Stand By Me - Is there a better 'coming of age' story? Four friends head out on an over-night journey to find the body of a kid who went missing. They learn a lot about life and each other along the way. "It happens sometimes. Friends come in and out of our lives like busboys in a restaurant. . . . I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was twelve. Jesus, does anyone?" So true.

4. Lawrence of Arabia - I put this in here not because of the legendary story of a pale, ambigously gay (though probably not, the 'incident' he suffered in a Turkish prison might have scarred him from then-on) Englishman, who while assigned to get the Arabs to side with the Brits during World War One, ends up leading them against the Turks, but also because of it's cinematic brilliance. I read an article a while back by a film critic who lamented that there aren't and movies that are visually expansive (and I mean naturally, Lord of the Rings only half-counts) anymore. He made the comment that the underappreciated "Thin Red Line" was the last one. "Lawrence of Arabia" is one of those movies that can only be truly appreciated on a large screen. Who'd have thought the desert could be so beautiful?

5. Last of the Mohicans - I wish there were more movies that cover one of my favourite periods of history - and ones that tell 'real' stories. This movie, like the above, is just as visually stimulating as its plot is captivating. Hawkeye, Uncas, and Chingachgook and a handful of Brits try and kick some French and Huron/Abenaki ass during the Seven Years War. Wes Studi is fantastic as the traitorous Magua, the set for Fort William Henry is amazing, the costumes are exquisite, the music perfect (ask Tim) and the acting superb. Add to it Chingachgook swinging around that spike-adorned axe-handle-like club in the riveting action scenes, and you've got the making of a classic. (The only think I don't like is that Uncas doesn't die in the book, and Gen. Munro doesn't die either, let alone having his heart eaten by Magua.)

Top Five CBC Radio Programmes

2004-12-12T10:02:00.000-05:00

As a shameless CBC Radio junkie, this is going to be a tough one . . .

1. Groovy Shinny (part of larger great "Go" show) - music and trivia, what could be more 'me?' This show put the 'perfect stranger' against the three beautiful musical minds (regular and guest 'celebrities') in a winner-take-nothing contest to see who knows more about obscure musical knowledge. The perfect stranger was seemingly always pulled off the street - or they made it sound that way, maybe they wrote in and asked to be a contestant, and made it sound random. Either way, great show that sadly no longer runs.

2. Dead Dog Cafe Comedy Hour - It didn't occur to me that Groovy Shinny no longer ran, as I wasn't going to add 'dead' shows (ie. radio Air Farce was brilliant). Having already added the above, I couldn't neglect the best satire show ever. Dead Dog featured Cherokee/Greek author and professor Tom King, and 'authentic' aboriginal side kicks Gracie Heavy Hand and Jasper Friendly Bear. Covered aboriginal/Canadian issues in a humourous way, sometimes toeing the line of political correctness, but always brilliant. See if you can find on-line resources such as 'get your authentic indian name' and 'lessons in conversational Cree' (which always seemed to be lines only celebrities and the insanely rich would say).

3. Madly Off in All Directions - stand-up comedy from classic to current. Often took requests, too, so it could go back, waaaay back. I'd often make an excuse to go for a drive when the show was on to be alone, enjoying scenery, and so I could laugh my ass off in private.

4. Quirks and Quarks - yah, Bob Macdonald is kinda goofy looking and himself a bit 'quirky,' but what scientist isn't? I was never that good at (or even interested in for that matter) science in school because of all the math. Q+Q is one of those shows, like David Suzuki's "Nature of Things," that brings out interesting and relevant scientific information in such a way that doesn't put you to sleep.

5. The Current - cutting edge national/global journalism that is progressive, unbiased, and always stimulating. Add to that the sarcastic "Voice" who intros each episode, and you've got a winner of a balanced programme.

. . . honourary mentions to Definitely Not the Opera (really, too long to be absolutely perfect - Sook-yin is doing a great job with it, though), Vinyl Cafe (Stuart's stories are great, but I don't share his musical tastes), and Between the Covers/Northern Lights (softly-spoken story shorts and soothing sounds for bedtime).

Top Five Celebrity Crushes

2004-12-11T18:05:00.000-05:00

1. Emily Haines - Lead singer from Metric. Beautiful, tall, lanky (but not sickly thin), short hair and kinda grungy dress, and a musician to boot! If she were an athlete with a wonderful personality, I'd definitely propose.

2. Catherine Bell (aka. 'Mac' on JAG) - I hate lawyer shows, and eventhough there's military stuff, I don't watch full episodes. That said, I often flip back to catch glimpses of Colonel Mac.

3. Josephine Forsman - Chick punk, you say? Yeah, and surprisingly damn good. The Sahara Hotnights hail from sunny Sweden, and aren't the type of girls who'd make your stereotypical "Swedish Swim Team." Though they're all cute, and lead singer Maria Andersson used to be up there for me, she's recently been ousted from such a high-ranking spot by their drummer. Josephine has just eough bottled blonde to highlight her natural good looks. Add to it some wicked drumming theatrics and I'm instantly ga-ga.

4. Heather Graham - I don't normally go for blondes, but I make an acception here. I think it was her role in Austin Powers that did it for me - and I haven't even seen Boogie Nights!

5. Vicky Zhao - star of the very funny Chinese pic "Shaolin Soccer," she epitomises the word 'cute.' Even when she's the 'ugly girl' at the beginning of the movie you can see her sweetness shine through the makeup.

With regards to Nick Hornby . . .

2004-12-11T18:00:00.000-05:00

. . . I saw About a Boy for the third and fourth time this past week and wanted to finally pick up the book. The library was fresh out, so I got High Fidelity instead. (Why it took me until a non-book-reading bus ride to figure out the wittiness of Championship Vinyl = Championship Final - and as a soccer fan!!! - I don't know?)

This week, I'm going to lay down some Top Fives. One list a day, and especially as my mentality often fits into the same stream as Barry, so wonderfully played by Jack Black in the movie.

Saturday's list . . .

The First XV

2004-12-06T23:43:00.000-05:00

After doing the top four list, it brought back old memories of the great guys I've coached over the years and that there are just so many contenders. I still hold firm on the top four, but I have often wondered who would make up my best Orillia Warriors XV? Based on talent over personal qualities (as the last post was about), here's what I came up with:

15. Jeremy Clark
14. Taylor Binns
13. Ben Chesser
12. Jeff Cooper
11. Rudolf Erasmus
10. Luke Sedgwick
9. Josh Horne

8. Josh Young
7. Matt Thornton
6. Nathan Robertson
5. Matt Douglas
4. Matt Vandenberg
3. Rob Bennett
2. Kyle McIsaac
1. Tyler Hunt

Subs: Chris Debenedet (prop), Matt Tod (smallest hooker), Matt/Jason DeVroom (second row), Dan Katsuno (back row), Graham Ball (utility), Jeff Clarke (back three, half back), Ryan Seigel (three-quarter).

I'm probably forgetting someone, so maybe I'll make a Second XV if I can think of one. On pure game reliability, I think that's my game-day 22.

Everyone needs a good pat on the back.

2004-12-05T10:20:00.000-05:00

While slowly rolling through my team's individual year end evaluations, and having just completed a glowing review of one of my favourite players, I made the comment that she was one of my 'best of all time.' It led to me wonder, who else would rank in the upper echelons of the kids I've coached over the last six years? . . . it's been that long, eh? From Twin Lakes in the spring of 1999 to Carleton Women having just finished a month ago. That's been some 12 different teams, and more players from age 14-40 (yes, the Coven has some women who are valiantly still going!) than I would care to count.

I came up with a list of three, and then figured one more needed attention, so increased it to ten. Then I figured some were border-line with those just behind them, and decided to reduce to to four stand-alones. Here they are, in no particular order:

1. Michelle Losos - From my current team, Michelle is one of those players who defines the word commitment. Great player, great attitude, gets along with everyone, wonderful leader, and even offers her time to run extra sessions for the girls. She carriers a fine ability to snipe for open spaces that many of the women I've coached don't seem to have. Despite carrying an injury into this season, she stayed on as assistant coach, and though she doesn't recognize it, could have a good future in it with her abilities when retirement eventually beckons. You're going to have to spring for cable, Mich, and become addicted to Sunday morning rugby.

2. Matt Thornton - Current OUA all-star and OUA Silver and Gold medalist over the last two years, "Billy" (still don't know where the nickname comes from) is a workhorse. Having moved from fly half to flank, I think Matt has proved himself to be a classic 'fetching' openside flank who should take the opportunity to play rugby at a much higher level. Despite the accolades and his obvious dominance on the field, he's one who forever comes across as being humble. He also knows you can't rise above the competition on just talent, so obviously puts a lot of time into developing his own fitness . . . watch out for the Carleton girls, Matt. They'll be looking out for you.

3. Rudolf Erasmus - I only coached Rudolf for four months during my brief spell at Park Street Collegiate, but if I had the powers of Dr. Frankenstein or the Railians, I would clone that boy. If you haven't guessed by the name, he was born in South Africa. Whether it's because we're relatively new to the game or we've adopted the boring international style I blame the Aussies and the English of the last few years for, it was very refreshing to have a player who showed lots of creativity not because he was coached into it, but simply because having fun with the game comes natural. Talent aside, he was a kid who successfully juggled playing a couple of sports at the same time, and looking after his shy little brother Waldo (pronounced Val-doo) when his dad had taken ill for a while. Too bad he moved back to British California . . . I would have adopted him for my very own - if he were an orphan, that is.

4. Josh Horne - Brother of one of the greatest players I've ever played 'with,' at first glance you wouldn't believe Josh is a very strong rugby player. Standing somewhere around 5'10" and weighing no more than 150 lbs (forgive me if I've under-sold you), he's not anyone's first impression of what a rugby player looks like. Therein lies the beauty of this game - there's room for everyone from the fat to the thin, from the very tall to the very short, and everyone in between. Josh is the quintessential scrum half with vision, courage, determination, and oftentimes with an angry Yorkshire terrier-like grit. Put all the mental stuff together with lightning-like quickness and a bullet of a pass and you have any coach's first choice scrum half! With a positive outlook on his recent lumbar issues, hopefully he'll make a speedy and long term return to the game he loves so dear.

To the rest of you who might view this, it's been a pleasure to coach you. You wouldn't be on this list if you weren't. :)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Music this week? I've been all around this week, but stand out songs that get an instant 'repeat' after listening to them have been: "Rings Around the World" by Super Furry Animals, "Happiness by the Kilowatt" by Alexisonfire, and "The Weight" by Travis (yes, a cover of The Band's original - take a load off Fanny, indeed). I just spent time downloading albums by AC Newman and Straylight Run so this week could have some new 'choice cuts' as Matthew Crosier on CBC tends to say.

When I grow up, I want to be Jonanthan Quayle Higgins.

2004-12-02T18:57:00.000-05:00

If you have no clue as to what I'm talking about, you're definitely not chuckling to yourself, thinking 'yes, that is sooo true,' and you have therefore never been even a casual watcher of Magnum PI.

This is one of the shows I remember from my youth - along with Macgyver, The Muppets, The Cosby Show, and MASH - which I get a kick out of watching again, despite the short shorts (okay, Tim, "nut-huggers"), tame comedy, mullets, and bad puns. Anyone who's known me pre-grade 10 might remember the mullet, and I guess I can have some consolation in knowning that Macgyver and I had the same hair. Every night (I get a chance) at 9pm, when I tune into the Prime Network, and hear that porno-film-inspired opening to Magnum PI, a smile appears on my face knowing I will get some meaningless entertainment from that little box that sits in our living room.

Yeah, I said it. I've seen every Simpsons episode at least three times, and frankly, it's getting a little stale. Reality shows choke. Can't be bothered to get into a drama series. I don't find new sitcoms that funny (though can't ever find when King of Queen's is on - yes, I know, Adam. I do look like Kevin James). Newsworld can be downright depressing sometimes. TLC has been taken over by the home repair, clean your house, re-do your wardrobe shows. I'm too into British sports to bother with Sportsnet or TSN. Not since "New York Undercover" in my hip-hop phase have I cared to watch one of the millions of cop/lawyer shows. Even my beloved History Television doesn't entertain me as much any more . . . though "SAS: Are You Tough Enough?" is the only reality show I can honestly say I look forward to watching (check out England women's rugby international Susie Appleby in the final four this weekend!). But whenever the 'classic' re-runs come on, I can unashamedly find my eyes glued to the tube for the half/hour that it's on for.

Magnum and Macgyver have recently been added by Prime and Spike respectively, and they're like a trip down memory lane. The A-Team was on for a while too, but don't seem to run into it anymore. These have added to my ritualistic week-nightly watching of MASH - the greatest show ever. Some wonder, as do I sometimes, what's the attraction of such programs? Nostalgia is always a factor, reminding me of times when I was young and those 'down times' with the hottest shows on 80s televison was but a minor laxidasical break from all the outdoor fun we had in good old Emsdale. I've come to rationalize, however, that these shows aren't really that bad if you look past the lack of current special effects technology and the obvious difference in fashion.

Did you know Macgyver is a pretty wholesome character? I've been joking with Ian about this, but the man may as well have been Canadian! (thanks to the IMDB, we found the show was filmed in BC, so not that far off) The character doesn't like guns, is a champion of social and environmental causes, is always helping people on his days off, doesn't take advantage of women (like that lecherous Michael Knight - ie. Knight Rider), and even plays hockey for crissakes! I even read that his 'macgyverisms' (thanks again, IMDB) are actually based on scientific fact, and the producers were good enough not to show all the steps so kids couldn't copy it. Wow, what a nice thing to do? Let's adopt Macgyver into Canada, shall we?

Like any show, the odd script can be kinda lame, and so I wonder why I still watch the ones that do kinda bite in the end? For Magnum, I think it has to do with the romanticism of the whole show. He's a guy without a day-to-day job, solving mysteries, is former Navy, living as a permanent guest of a millionaire author in Hawaii. What could be more ideal than that? I have said I want to end my days in Samoa, so maybe I could become the Samoan 'Magnum' in my golden years? Throw in all the cool 'Nam flashbacks, occasional witty novel/film noire -like narration, and a lively cast of supporting characters and you've got yourself a pretty entertaining show. There's also continuation in the grand sceme, so you can grow with the characters and their own personal sagas, and not be watching 'case-to-case' episodes as some . . . ahem CSI . . . shows do (forgive me if I'm wrong, I don't watch it, but never learned anything about the characters in the few episodes I've seen).

As I alluded to before, MASH is the greatest show of all time. Why? I could go on forever as to why, but I'll leave you with a few choice observations/facts. MASH's final episode, where Hawkeye goes nuts, still holds the record for having the highest viewership for one evening.
After the first couple of seasons they really started tackling some major issues, from doctoring to war to general humanity. The writing was so brilliant and the acting so good that I have both shed a tear and laughed my ass off in the same scene on many occasions.

If you haven't seen these shows, I suggest you give them (in not the others, at least MASH) a shot. What else could I stand to see again? Quantum Leap would be a good choice. Never did see if Sam got back to his 'current' time.

Oh, and why would I be "Higgy Baby" when I grow up? Well, being retired relatively young from something as adventurous as a military career would be nice. I'd love to look after a tropical estate of some kind. Having a couple of loyal dogs would be a must. Wearing khaki suits me just fine. And I'd definitely bore to death anyone who allowed me to start one of my rambling stories . . . like you just have if you've gotten to the end of today's tale, and are still coming back to this page.

Thanks.

To go boldly where I haven't gone before . . .

2004-11-25T16:29:00.000-05:00

Note that I did not split the infinitive the way Gene Roddenberry did in the classic intro to Star Trek.

"The infinitive is to go, and it has been 'split' by the adverb boldly. Split infinitives have been the cause of much controversy among teachers and grammarians, but the notion that they are ungrammatical is simply a myth: in his famous book Modern English Usage, Henry Fowler listed them among 'superstitions'!
Split infinitives are frequently poor style, but they are not strictly bad grammar. In the example above, to avoid the split infinitive would result either in weakness (to go boldly) or over-formality (boldly to go): either would ruin the rhythmic force and rhetorical pattern of the original. It is probably good practice to avoid split infinitives in formal writing, but clumsy attempts to avoid them simply by shuffling adverbs about can create far worse sentences."

(courtesy: askoxford.com )

The passport application is officially in. It seems that 100-odd other 'smart' people figured 3pm would be a 'dead' time - well after lunch, well before end of work - to go and file their applications. So I had to bite the bullet and get in line with everyone else. After getting my number, 283, and sitting down beside a tough-looking Cameron sergeant, I did a double take. The board fashed 228. Was I willing to wait for 55 people to get up and go? Uh, no. I went and booked our Women's Rugby awards dinner at the Cock and Lion (no, not a strip club - 'cock' means rooster) and got some classic books on rugby, complete with 80s long hair and sideburns - oh, and a travel guide on Wales.

Anyway, back at the Passport Office with 15 mins. before close it turns out I only had to wait for five more people. Talk about good timing. At the desk the nice, but expressionless man ran through all my paper work with a fine tooth comb. I have the bad tendency to try and read facial expressions, and things didn't look so good. I could feel my face going red, waiting for him to call me on some minor mistake that would make all my waiting and double-checking for nought, or for him to compare my brutal picture to one of Canada's most wanted and have that nice, tiny, old French security guard at the door haul me away on an Intelligence Certificate. But as he gave me the date on which I'd expect to receive my passport, my paranoia was laid to rest. Mission accomplished.

Now I have to wait until the 7th, and then immediately process an application for a UK work visa. Why do I always leave things like this to the last minute?

On a stress-relieving note, the Director of Rugby for Clifton RFC in Bristol finally replied to my email and expressed a simple "looking forward to having a keen volunteer" message. I'll be taking the opportunity to return to grass-roots coaching, but hopefully work with the more-advanced groups to further my skills as a coach, and hob nob with some of the England/Welsh internationals on their ladies team.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Been going with 'angry' this week in my music selections. Alexisonfire. Thursday. Thrice. ...And You Will Know Us By The Trail of Dead. Rival Schools. Strung Out. Despite what others think, I don't feel it reflects my mood. Remember, I'm Jerry Seinfeld. Nothing goes absolutely perfect, but nothing is ever disastrous either. That stuff is definitely good music to have on when you're working out - definitely better than the Travis I've been downloading recently.

Tensions relax only to grow again.

2004-11-20T17:13:00.001-05:00

Well now that rugby's over, I'm finally finding myself with free time. What do normal people do with free time? I went to the Museum of Civilization the other day, and capped a great tour (not to mention a nostalgic one, with so many reminders of home there) off with a trip to the Sweetgrass Aboriginal Bistro. Authentic Aboriginal cuisine in downtown Ottawa? Yes, and though the food is fantastic, I have to warn you that it's in the Market . . . yes, just a bit expensive. You must go, that's a given. If you don't have the $30 to spend on the buffalo steak dinner (have had buffalo before, it's awesome!), go for lunch and get an Indian Taco . . . though Matt Douglas assures me $10 is way above the $6 standard, there's no where else in Ottawa to get one outside of the Odawa pow wow in May. I had resasonable success making my own, though, so if you wanna come over for Indian Tacos, let me know.

But my low-stress period officially ends this week as I really have to stop procrastinating on getting ready to go for England. I seem to have a built in measuring device that lets me know the exact minimum time required for me to get something done - my academic career hinged upon it! Anyway, I finally got my picture and passport application signed by a guarantor (ie. a lawyer because no one of authority here has known me for two years) and will hand it in on Monday. If it is finished within the advertised two weeks, maybe I'll actually get a work permit in time to go just after New Year's. If not, I'll be spending a longer time around Orillia until I'm good to go. Phew, I really do need a personal secretary! I've decided on moving to the city of Bristol and am looking to join Clifton RFC to further my rugby development. I plan on taking the time to try and apply to a few more jobs - because I really do hate doing the baby sitter work of supply teaching - and would like the confidence in knowing I'll have a steady flow of cash coming in.

Again, one wonders who all reads this, but for the Ottawa crew, I'm out on the 23rd so we have to hang before then. For the Orillia crew, I'm around and willing to hang from Boxing Day onward. Let's keep in touch!

Music of the Week: Having just made a compilation for Jen and Tara, featuring little known (to them) rock tunes from North America and Europe, I am currently fixed on the song "Juxtaposed With U" by Super Furry Animals. Have been going mad trying to track down every b-side Travis has ever released. I once thought that was a staggering task, with 60+ b-sides having been released in conjunction with the four albums, but am down to needing just about 10 more. Not bad for a week's work. Now if only I can find those pesky new International Noise Conspiracy ones!

(Without intending to violate copyright rules, I wish for you to check out this song and sing along with me! It is with much love and adoration for this song that I want others to hear it, so please don't get mad SFA - not like they'll ever see this.)

JUXTAPOZED WITH U
It's easy when you know how,
To get along without Biff! Bang! Pow!
And if I see that you're fed up,
I'll stop and give you a leg up.

. . .You've got to tolerate,
All those people that you hate,
I'm not in love with you,
But I wont hold that against you,

This is a tale of 2 city/situations,
Mutual appreciation,
Away from narrow pre-conception,
Avoiding conflict hyper-tension,
Non-phobic word aerobic.
This was my domain,
Till someone stole my name.

Let's get juxtaposed, juxtaposed,
Just suppose I juxtapose with you

Finally, the end of the US Tour saga.

2004-11-13T18:50:00.000-05:00

Day two of the US tour went over without much incident of note, but the game did go quite well.

We started off to a lovely Saturday morning with perfect weather, sun shining, barely a cloud in the sky. We rallied up the troops from their much-deserved slumber, squared down our cozy hotel rooms, packed up the vans and headed downtown for some 'brunch.'

After much driving around, probably giving the local drivers headaches with our attempts to keep three vans and one car in-line and together, we finally found a place to eat. In a little cafe on Lake Champlain, we sat down to a good homestyle meal and quickly discovered that 'homestyle' food in the US means there's lots to go around. You see, here I think we get meals fit so light-eaters can get their fill and not waste any. There, the hungry man's needs are definitely taken care of. I don't think many of the girls finished their meals, and I know even I was reeling from my massive steak and egg melt. Wow, what cookery!

After brunch, we made our way to the field, only getting lost once, but I think that was Bob's fault this time, not mine! Hoping everyone's meals would settle before kickoff, we got their early and prepped in hopes of going 2-0 on our trip. Without going into too much detail about the game, we definitely met stiffer competition from the UVM girls. Things were back and forth until the last few minutes when, who else, but Sophia Ranieri took things into her own hands, litterally. She tried one of her trademark chip kicks - that UMV's fly half was ready for, and charged down - only to have it come straight down into Soph's hands. Without time to recover, the UVM no. 10 could only turn to see the fortunate Sophia sprint past her and under the posts for an easy try. Converted nicely and with a nice cushion, we Soph added another and showed what a force she is on the field . . . too bad that would be her last game for us this season. Pray she's back for my third year in charge in 2005!

We also suffered another blow in losing our prop/lock Robyn Nolasco. After suffering an ankle injury before last season's start, I was hoping to have her as a key player this season. She played half a game last year to test the ankle and I saw someone who was aptly aggressive enough to play in the Tight Five, despite having the laid-back mannerisms of a pot smoker - though she doesn't touch the stuff, ever! I spent the last few minutes of the game giving her all the medical attention I was capable of, and definitely making good use of my 'bedside manner' as she was probably quite certain her season was over before it really began. Don't know if she'll brave the ankle again for 2005, but she's one I would love to see back in a Carleton jersey.

Anyway, with the match won and done, and plans to meet up with some UVM players for dinner, we decided to hit up the lake for a bath/swim. With bad directions in hand we made our way out of town and after a bit of headscratching, found the lake. Turns out the girls had invaded a private beach owned by the owners of all the posh houses around and I yelled at them to get out . . . for the sake of the old lady wondering what we were doing there, making chit chat with her in hopes of giving the girls a few minutes more. Cooled off, relatively clean we headed back into town for some grub.

The pub we had dinner in has the weirdest order procedure ever. Waitress gives you a menu and a number. You go up and order it yourself. Prices were good and, of course, the helpings were huge, so I guess it was worth not having service. I actually didn't mind it . . . saved on the tip!

One of the UVM team's resident lesbians (by her account, at least 40% of the team) told us all about the 'war' between the left and right in the US over the gay marriage issue. There was an increasingly-heated bumper sticker war going on around Vermont where those on the right had come up with such slogans as "It's mom and dad, not Tom and Brad" and "People in Vermont shovel manure, not pack it." I have to admit, they are kinda funny (she laughed too, at the wittiness), but it's sad to think these attitudes still persist. I guess it's kinda timely I'm writing this after the re-election of G-Dub, because it seems enough close-minded individuals thought strongly enough about this issue that they had to go and re-elect a man who got them into an unneccesary war and isn't doing much about preventing their economy from spinning out of control. Good luck, liberal Americans. Keep fighting the good fight.

Before leaving the field, the St. Mikes coach had informed us the bonfire/camping was off and we quickly decided it wasn't worth paying for another night and made plans to be home before midnight. We couldn't leave Burlington, however, without checking out the famed Church Street promenade. Picture Sparks Street in Ottawa, but longer, nicer, filled with nicer shops, and with waaaay more people visiting it. That place was awesome. Every store you could ever want to do specialty shopping in and lots of street performers. While the girls raided a Ben and Jerry's, Bob and I checked out a swing band in the middle of the street, complete with fantastic dancers, from the 20-something couple to the 80-something couple. As a huge fan of Big Band, I was in Heaven. If only I had taken those swing dancing lessons!

Frustrated by my 'granny driving,' everyone made their way back at their own pace and were back in Ottawa by midnight. I only made two wrong turns on the way home, and again can put it down to being too embroiled in conversation with Michelle. We old people were kind of out of touch with the young'uns so found a nice bond in our agedness while on tour. :) Too bad Andree (who I found is even older than I) wasn't there too and we could have had a good "senior citizen's" chat group.

All in all the tour was fantastic. We came in WAY under budget, won both games, made some good friends/connections, and probably learned a little bit too.

The season has finally ended, and though this has been the best year for Carleton Women's Rugby . . . ever? . . . I still feel we could have done better. I have big changes in the works for next year. People are starting to take notice and not only do I expect a bigger, more talented turnout of players, but the rugby community seems to be noticing that we're starting to put down roots and make a name for ourselves. We didn't necessarily take any big scalps this year - like beating Ottawa U as we did last year - but even just having me back again, and promising to come back for at least one more has got coaches thinking we should be making a step up soon. I'll be putting my lobbying skills to work to get us a schedule of inter-university games next year to see where we really match up, and hopefully we'll have a good enough showing to prove that we can be a force to be reckoned with.

. . . but I digress.

2004-10-31T18:12:00.000-05:00

Sorry if anyone has anxiously been waiting the second, and final installment of the great US Adventure Tour. I'll have to disappoint you just a bit longer as I haven't felt quite so 'litteral' in the last little while. It's been a busy season, sometimes frustrating, but definitely well worth it all the same.

I actually managed to get back to Floral Park for a few days over Thanksgiving. Sorry I didn't get to see anyone. I only went two places: to Round Again to ask Brett to order me The Charlatans - Up at the Lake, and South - With the Tides. Should be giving him a shout in a week or two to see if they've arrived, now that I think of it. It's funny as I requested these albums at Record Runner here in Ottawa, and not only had they not heard of them (and this is the GOOD store, not an HMV or Music World), they couldn't even find them in their precious database. Not available in Canada, okay, but Brett not only knows the groups, he writes it in his note book - with a pen - and says they should arrive in three weeks. The man is a god-send. I suggest whenever you're in Orillia and need a cd, dvd, or campy tv/movie action figure, check out his shop

. . . again, I digress . . .

The only other place I got to was the Pow Wow at the Rama MASK. My first hometown pow wow, sadly, but it was a good time spent by myself among a massive crowd of people I didn't know. As a lover of literature, I had to peruse the set up of books among all the art. Quickly noticed all the books were by Basil H. Johnson, a man we studied in Canadian Lit. (odd that the CU prof who teaches the most Aboriginal Lit in the Canadian class is an Irishman?). Took me a few seconds to process that the man standing in front of the elderly man selling the books was asking for a dedication . . . wuh? Could it be him? Sure enough, it was Basil Johnson, and he made a comment about my North Simcoe Rugby sweater . . . "How did we do against South Simcoe? Beat them everytime!" I told him I had studied some of his works in university and he humbly asked if we were just looking at structure, but I reassured him it was all about the content. As I presented the soon-to-be-mine copy of Indian School Days, he quickly grabbed it, asked my name, and dedicated it to me from "Inmate #43, Basil H. Johnson." A nice experience. Very nice. After watching some dancing and taking in a lot of second-hand sweetgrass, I went home and managed to avoid the Indian Taco booths . . . I had just ate before coming. Idiot. Wasn't thinking.

That day included my last bike of the year. Biked everywhere, almost every day from April to September. Total weight lost: much. Feel like a new being, but still have a ways to go. Gotta earn the right to wear that #12 on my back, and maybe even a #10 if I can get that left hand spin down!

Still trying to get all the logistics sorted out before my move to the UK. Anybody know a good guarantor . . . might have to hit up Dr. Miller! Have a couple of jobs to apply for, but will probably just resort to being a supply teacher. Today spent a lot of time researching the Leicester area. The train system seems awesome. I can get from Leicester to Coventry in less time via a regularly-running train in less time than it takes to get to work in Ottawa via OC Transpo. Gonna check out Gloucester later. (yes, 'less-ter' and 'gloss-ter,' Mr. Horton!) Of course they are both 'rugby areas,' but the good thing about the rugby community is they take care of their own. Club websites offer help finding accomodation and even jobs. What a great sport!!!

Metric is my band of the moment. Don't know how I missed their show a week or two ago . . . oh, right, Billy Talent was playing too. Jeez, didn't want to mix in that crowd. Emily Haines, I love you dearly.

A Weekend to Remember.

2004-10-14T20:22:00.000-04:00

We in Canada, from those who first came here, to those of us whose ancestors came looking to start anew over the last three centuries, to those who are newly pursuing such a dream all tend to fall into one of the bad habits of being Canadian - believing our myths. Probably our strongest myth is the belief that we are morally superior in all ways to our neighbours (not neighBORs) to the south. Mouse sleeping next to an elephant. Peacekeepers holding back the war-mongerers. The industrious beaver or the predatory eagle? Hardly. Just go there, experience ordinary America, like the brave tourists of the Carleton Women's Rugby team did . . . oh, and Bob Gordon, honourary member . . . to Burlington, Vermont to play St. Michael's College and the University of Vermont.

As we approached the US border crossing, a number of us having goosebumps from seeing a car being stripped up ahead, we all had our 'two pieces of identification' in hand. Turns out we only needed one, and we weren't harrassed at all. Our slightly-grumpy, Wilfred Brimley lookalike guard most likely didn't have his Wheaties that morning, or was still lamenting he didn't pursue his true calling as a fisherman on the high seas.

Having to make a quick pit stop on our way to Burlington, I was humbled at the roadside projections of affection for their heros fighting in Iraq. Handwritten posters welcomed home two local boys and yellow ribbons were everywhere. Whatever your opinions on the war, you have to appreciate that whole communities rally around 'their' sons and daughters. I, for one, realized I was in a nation at war, not as close as those who have to suffer the horror, but definitely among people with a real concern for those involved and who wished for a speedy outcome so that they could come home soon.

After getting back on the road, and making the first of what would become expected, almost-predictable wrong turns for me, the leader of our three-van convoy we found our field and got ready to play St. Mikes. Within the first fifteen minutes, and a Sophia Ranieri (how I miss her this season) hattrick, we realized Canadians generally are better rugby players than the US. One myth to believe. Talking to the UVM players standing on our side, drinking dutifully and admiring our 'funny ak-sents,' we found that they unfortunately had no high school rugby at all. This was going to be a rough weekend for our hosts. Good thing for them, we're at less than our potential this year, and didn't even bring down a full team (each team gave us their rookies to fill out the numbers, thanks).

St. Mikes were awesome hosts and supplied enough post-game pizza to satisfy twice the amount of players, or enough Canadians who hadn't eaten since morning. We almost had a major disaster as we planned to attend the party the UVM girls were hosting - one of our rookies went missing! Her seemingly siamese twin had no clue where she was - bad news. Searching high and low, far and wide, and after dark for a good half hour, I resorted to hit up campus security to make a report. At one of those flashing blue safety posts I talked to a less-than-helpful security person who was getting me to make such a report from a real phone, I heard my name called in a friendly hello. Our missing young'un had found better showering facilities via two veterans we thought had already departed. Crisis averted. Heartattack prevented. My life and career plans still in tact.

After another two or three wrong turns - due to bad directions, I swear - we found the party in what could only be kindly described as a Student Ghetto and the management team of me, Bob, and Michelle went to hunt for a cheap motel to crash in. (see previous post to figure out why I hadn't done this prior to leaving) We managed to save a whole lot of cash by staying in two adjacent motels, and the management team even got their own. Lucky Michelle got her own bed as I had to deal with Bob's trick leg, which subconciously acts like an octopus' tentacle (sorry, dude, had to tell that story). He became fascinated with the fact that our hosts at the Belle Aire Motel had been extras on Doctor Quinn, Medicine Woman as kids and their mom embarassingly had proof pictures displayed on the wall.

The management team headed back to the party to inform the girls of our success, and to let them know who they were rooming with and when curfew was. Yes, I'm an ass like that. Bob was the hit with our team, however, as most Orillians know how to have a good time. He earned the nickname Fun Bobby, while I might have been dubbed 'No-Fun Robbie.' Needless to say, my suggestion of a 9am light practice was met with such negativity, I feared I might have begun such cause for a Bounty-like mutiny. Being the responsible coach, I had the management team keep an eye on the partiers while I drove back the first wave of 'partied-out people.' I got to finally catch some rest in my motel room and took the time to discover the wonders of American television. Believe it or not, in Vermont, they don't only have the CBC, but CBC Newsworld too! Despite my addiction to our national information service, I resorted to watching my other favourite media outlet, Fox Sports World - and felt I was in heaven, it being on regular tv and not on digital cable!

Surprisingly, by midnight, all the of girls were back in their rooms . . . even Team Danger, consisting of hard partiers Lindsey and Robyn, and less-than-adult-like Meagan and Steph. Why I let that be a match-up, I don't know. But they all behaved themselves, so no worries I guess. I slept relatively well, despite the tentacle, and drifted off to sleep with the low musings of Elbow on my discman.

(The account of day one was kinda big, so stay tuned for day two at a later date.)

The week (and a half) that was.

2004-09-16T18:04:00.000-04:00

Wow, has it been a month since I last posted?

It's been so long since my September went to Hell, and I don't really want to stir up all the frustrations that occurred over the past week and half, but as I've always been a champion of 'writing as therapy' here goes . . .

It all began on move-out day. Dave Macleod (not pronounced mc-lewd, mc-lloyd, or mc-lod) was kind enough to help Ian and I move some of the larger items to our new place up town. I left the smaller stuff in my room to get it out the next day, after work. Jane (the new tennant) informed me that in our landlord's infinite wisdom, he had decided to paint the steps to my room with oil-based paint. That shit weren't gonna dry for a day. Unforntunately, I had not been forewarned of this and initially found out when I stepped on the first and second landing and my shoes stuck to them. I proceded to track a bit of paint on the floor and curse very loudly. Bewildered, but now calm I managed to get the light stuff they had moved from my room out of 'courtesy' (note: I do not blame Jane at all for this). But when I went downstairs to get the yellow, see-through (note that fact) garbage bag that had my winter gear, blankets, and most importantly my Carleton jacket in it, it was not to be found. I did find my spring jacket that was covering it, and hoped that no one took tossed it out as garbage. I mean, who would put their coat on a bag of garbage? What bag of 'garbage' doesn't smell and feels as light as a bag full of blankets would be? Anyway, I'm still unsure of what happened to it, and frankly don't care much anymore - though I probably should.

Finally getting moved out/in the next day with the help of Ian's old VW, surely on it's last legs, I proceded to put together what should have begun as the "one step beyond" from last year's great rugby season. Alas, it was not to be so. To put a long story into a Reader's Digest-like synopsis, from the 30 or so emails I got about trying out for our team, maybe four or five actually made good on their pledge. We went into our warm-up controlled scrimmages with Ottawa U and Trent that weekend short players, then understrength. The 5-0 loss to Trent hurt only asmuch as we knew with a few more bodies we would have won. The first week of practices didn't look much better either, and I began to curse Orientation Week. I declared that my players weren't ready to live their desire to be a Varsity Team. I also began to question why I was actually putting in my time and giving up my dreams to go overseas to deal with this . . .

. . . but was looking forward to our glorious rugby tour to Vermont. Things would surely improve, right? Well, leading up to our departure, it didn't look as such. We had planned to take four mini-vans down, and under Budget's rules all drivers have to be 25+. Not a problem, we had four of us. Four days prior to our departure, lightning struck and all three of them had emergency plans that prevented them from going on the trip. To make matters worse, a few of our best players weren't able to go. Frantically trying to find other drivers among friends and staff, AND trying to get Blue Cross when it was really too late to register (my bad), I went from annoyed mode to crisis mode . . . then Fate struck.

I am Jerry Seinfeld. Nothing ever really goes win-win, but everything always tends to work itself out to a comfortable, neutral level.

On the Wednesday prior to leaving, Carleton secured a new deal with a different car company and 'young-uns' could drive (though Bob was still allowed to come - sorry again that you missed the Canada hockey game, dude!). Our travel insurance came through at the 11th hour, and we even managed to pick up two girls who had played with CU before I started.

The trip went off without a hitch, and we came away with two of two wins, some new friends, lots of stories, and a great over-all experience. I have fallen in love with rugby touring, and (dare I say it) that little American town, which reminded me so much of a (I'll get in trouble from family for this) a nicer version of Huntsville, ON. One only wishes we could go touring the countryside all the time, but our miniscule budget unfortunatley does not allow for it.

My next entry will have a deeper account of our trip to Vermont. Stay tuned. Thanks to Jen Macauley for suggesting it!

And the winners are . . .

2004-08-15T11:26:00.000-04:00

You heard it here first, these are my top five favourite bands of all-time (order will shuffle, but the names will remain the same) . . .

1. The Clash. The greatest band of all time. Playing revolutionary music during a revoluntionary time, Joe and the boys proved that punks can think too. Their music also branched out, showing they could be diverse too, from the tribute to early hip-hop on Magnificent Seven to gospel and country-like songs. After their demise, Joe managed to put out three fantastic solo albums that were actually more folk than punk. My hero unfortunately passed away last winter. RIP.
Recommended listening: "Revolution Rock"

2. The Specials. Coventry's own late 70s/early 80s answer to all the racial tension that was going on in England at that time, The Specials kicked out a second wave of ska music that preached self respect, racial harmony, and struggle. The Too Tone ska revival didn't last long, but definitely left its mark with a third and fourth generation of bands that are still kicking today.
Recommended listening: "Poor Little Rich Girl"

3. Rancid. Lars, Tim, Matt, and Brett. Four working-class heros who one can say have picked up where The Clash left off. Their catchy songs manage to inspire, educate, inform, and always entertain. Old punks rip on them when they've diverged from the 'true punk' path, but their ability to pull in rockabilly and reggae influences only proves their more than "just punks."
Recommended listening: "Roots Radicals"

4. The Charlatans. Coming out of that whole post-new wave, Smiths, Madchester, Stone Roses wave, The Charltans mixed simple beats, organ, guitar rock and the nasal voice of Tim Burgess to pump out several solid records over the last 15 or so years. Each album has offered a fresh direction from the last, but still maintaining a typically 'Charlatan' sound - even with the loss of keyboardist Rob Collins to a car accident in 1997. New albums surprisingly keep popping up, and they don't ever show signs of becoming stale like other bands who have carried on for so long.
Recommended listening: "Here Comes a Soul Saver"

5. Less Than Jake. The heroes of Gainsville, Florida, Less Than Jake create so much energy with their ska-punk songs that after dedicated listens, it's impossible NOT to become a fan. One of the few bands keeping ska alive after the fourth generation finally fizzled out, LTJ still seem to have the stamina to keep the fun tunes pumping with another great release in 2003.
Recommended listening: "The Art of Selling Yourself Short"

Criteria for selection demands that said band had to have released three good full-length albums. With one more brilliant release, Doves should crack the top five at the risk of LTJ.

Other honourable mentions:

The Beatles (yes, they're brilliant but I rate the early pop stuff so much higher than the later stuff)
Sloan
At the Drive-In
Dropkick Murphys
trebel charger
The Weakerthans

A question of sport.

2004-08-14T09:44:00.000-04:00

I reached a new pinnacle of rugby obsessiveness today. I'm sitting at work on a slow Saturday morning, 'watching' the All Blacks vs. Springboks game via text-based internet technology - and actually getting excited at the minute-by-minute brief descriptions. So sad . . . I'd rather be at the Duke.

I've also reached a point recently were almost no other sport matters anymore. I used to be a big fan of basketball, football, and soccer, but now, of the three, just English footy is an occasional indulgence. I've spent a countless amount of time reading and researching rugby this past year, and, as an eager student should be, am still hungry for more. I'm starting to get envious of my coaching mentor who's doing a Masters in coaching in BC this fall, and I still have three more ladders to climb before I can get to that stage!

This fall will be my second season at the helm of Carleton University's women's team and I am getting quite anxious. The girls showed last year we're not "just a club team," but could play against the best in town. I'm hoping to give them more tools and opportunites to prove their worth this fall and confident they'll rise to the challenge. The goal, as always, is to get them into the CIS league, playing against other universities rather than local clubs. I just hope the our efforts don't go unnoticed.

I'd love to stay here in Ottawa, fight for the promotion and even make a career as a rugby coach, but realistically I know it's highly unlikely in Canada. What are there for jobs? National-level coaches? Very few, a handful are full time. University jobs? Again, not full time. Only top schools pay well. Private schools are few and far between. Having an accent from a "Rugby Nation" would help me! Development Officer would suit me, and if by some stroke of bad luck I'm still in Canada come 2005, I'll be applying to do that in Eastern Ontario, but it's only a temporary job too.

Teaching doesn't really seem like the thing for me right now as I just don't have the passion for it. My unorthodox/iconoclastic nature seems to contradict a system that seems headed toward even more structure and standarization. Besides, being a paid coach (even if it's low pay and random hours) seems infinitely more enjoyable to me. I'll try and push this dream a little bit further. Currently, I'm looking for pastoral jobs in English private schools - supervising boarding houses, supply teaching, and obviously participating in the school life.

During this hunt, I've realized those kids have incredibly active school lives! There are clubs and societies for everything, not to mention the amount of sports available. Everyone plays something, and more importantly, the basic opportunity is there. One school I looked at earlier in the year has 22 rugby sides! - firsts, seconds, and thirds for the talented ones, and approximately two for every year of the "less-abled" boys, and intramural competitions between houses. How fun would that be? Now that's the type of atmosphere I would thrive in, if only I could get used to shaving daily and occasionally wearing a suit and tie. :)

But it makes me think of the relative failings of our system. Why don't our kids have such opportunities? As always, the answer is money. Yes, I am looking at private schools, but it seems even the state-funded ones have more sports opportunities than our kids get. I doubt they have to sacrfice their late nights, and lungs for that matter, to do charity bingo fundraising at places like Orillia's own smoldering tobacco retreat. In the current backdrop of the Olympics, in which Canada is sending it's smallest team in years, we have to lament at how we don't do enough for sports development in this country. These poor athletes and their families are sacrificing everything for a dream, and very few have the funding that would make it easy. A few years ago Australia decided to combat this reality and pumped countless resources into sport development . . . look at them now. They'll probably sit right behind the US in the medal count, all for a country with even less people than we have. I don't have any stats or figures to throw at you, but their performance on the world stage in rugby, cricket, athletics, and their relative success in sports not traditional with them speaks for itself. Observers like me, who would love to make a career in such a supportive culture, drool at the prospect of seeing Canada finally stop squandering money on extravagant salaries, fruitless endeavours, and government waste and put it where it really would benefit our society.

Declaration of Independence

2004-08-11T13:28:00.000-04:00

Isn't it awesome when you're into a band/movie/tv show that no one knows about? Being independent and searching for such media all by yourself is an adventure in itself, and being delivered into new worlds is the icing on the cake. You can get one of two (or often both) types of pleasure from this situation:

a) You're part of an exclusive group. Your fav isn't on Much Music (bar, maybe, The Wedge - once), in all the theatres, or on network tv. It hasn't been so over-played that it no longer has the magic it once did. Bandwagon-jumpers haven't pumped it up to that point, only to shoot it down once it becomes 'old' either. You also get the satisfaction of pooh-poohing non-believers as 'ill-educated,' making you feel a bit arrogantly superior - if only for a little while.

b) You get to be the person who 'introduces' it to your circle of friends. This should only be attempted with due caution. Will your friends actually appreciate it, or kill your enthusiasm by declaring it lame, stupid, or worse? However, if they do catch on and share your love for it, your friendship can be solidified that much more and you can annoy everyone else humming bars or spouting quotes.

Before I give you my three favs, here are some good sources to start going beyond the main stream: CBC Radio (esp. Radio 3 on Sat. nights), Exclaim Magaizine (free on your street corner, or at Round Again if you're in O-town), local indie pages like punkottawa.com, your campus radio station . . . etc.

Here are three from each media I am into you probably aren't - but are welcome to enjoy.

Music: MANSUN. A quartet from Liverpool who lasted from 1996 to 2004 (RIP). They were a really unique band who could pound out some epic rock tunes in a time when grunge and nu-metal was all the rage. In their arrogant way, they remarked that their "Six" album preceded Radiohead's "Kid A" and introduced some of the more creative stuff Radiohead went with. Also known for 70s rock star antics such as trashing hotel rooms and blurting out controversial statements . . . they're barred from Holiday Inns in Britain and entry to a country in SE Asia. I think it's Indonesia. Shennanigans aside, the music is tres cool. They can manage to put a song with a whole string section and do a punk-inspired one on the same album. The singer, Paul Draper, also manages to create some clever lyrics . . .

"I was worried so I went to see the vicar/ But before I could confess he first confessed to be a stripper" - from 'Stipper Vicar,' a song about a cross-dressing minister, done in the style of a pop rock song.

"'Believed anything that you said/ Put all those doubts in my head/ What a loser/ Stick around 'cos life is too short,' you said/ You said we could still be friends/ But you never kept your promises." - from 'Promises,' think about a love ballad for a loser. Pretty good.

"You're so full of venom that you'll spit into you're own sweet face." - from 'Disgusting,' another love-type song but about someone who's absolutely wretched.

They're also pretty cool for having as many b-sides as they do album tracks (I think 15 ep/single realeases for 3 albums). Unlike most other bands, the b-sides are actually good!!!

Movie: HEARTBREAK RIDGE. Clint Eastwood is a Marine Sgt. near retirement, and pretty much down on his luck in life and love. He is let back in his old unit, but has to train a bunch of misfits and losers to be an elite fighting unit - just ahead of the US liberation of Grenada in 1983. Clint is awesome in it. He has some terrific one-liners too.

"The United States' Marines is lookin' for a few good men - and unfortunately you ain't it. "

(said to a soldier who thought he was dead, after a helping hand up)
"Just because we're holding hands doesn't mean we'll be taking warm showers together until the wee hours of the morning."

(when he sees his arresting officer outside of court)
Clint: What's the matter, Reese, your nightstick file for divorce?
Cop: You know one of these days you'll be puking blood in some alley and you're going to look up and see me standing there!
Clint: Keep dreaming, sh*tball.
Cop: You're going to pay full price Rummy! I don't give no f**kin' serviceman's discount!
Clint: That's too bad, you're old lady does.

Television: BLACKADDER. Absolutely brilliant British comedy about four generations of Edmund Blackadder - from the illegitimate son of Richard IV, to a Lord in Queen Liz's court, to the butler to King George IV, to a lef-tenant in WWI. Always clawing for achievement, but never quite getting there. Never helps when you're surrounded by idiots like Lord Percy Percy, Lt. George, or the everpresent dung-shoveller, Baldrick. Check it out on the Comedy Network on Sundays at 5pm.

(while in a German prison)
Baldrick: I want my mum!
Blackadder: Yes, it'd be good to see her. I should imagine a maternally-outraged gorilla could be a useful ally when it comes to the final scrap.

Red Baron: How lucky you English are to find the toilet so amusing. For us, it is a mundane and functional item. For you it is the basis of an entire culture.

Blackadder: Baldrick, I would like to say how much I will miss your honest, friendly companionship.
Baldrick: Thank you, Mr B.
Blackadder: But, as we both know, it would be an utter lie. I will therefore confine myself to saying simply, 'Sod off and if I ever meet you again, it will be twenty billion years too soon.'

(upon accepting to switch roles with the king, fighting for him in a duel)
Blackadder: Very well, I accept. A man may fight for many things: his country, his principles, his friends, the glistening tear on the cheek of a golden child. But personally I'd mud wrestle my own mother for a ton of cash, an amusing clock, and a sack of French porn. You're on.

The Valley is Alive With the Sound of Music

2004-08-08T10:23:00.000-04:00

Ottawa has some great record shops. Turning Point, that guy next door, CD Exchange on Rideau (the others blow, however), and, of course, Record Runner. I once said that Brett's 'Round Again Records' in Orillia is the best shop I've ever seen, but now that Record Runner has a used section, it's running a very close second. And yes, despite the downloading/burning technology we have, I still buy cds. If you haven't figured it out, all the money I don't drink and/or party with goes into that addiction of mine. I haven't done a count lately, but I'm guessing there are easily over 350 in my collection - and much unlike the standard collection, I don't have any cds that just sit there, never to be listened to again. In fact, earlier this year I went through a two-month period where I went through my entire collection, one-by-one, without being able to sample a previously-listened to cd until I was through the collection.

What I've noticed lately as a Used Bin Scrounger is that there are several bands you NEVER see in the used bin. Yes, they are not quite so popular, but I also hope they are good enough bands that those who buy their cds would never think of trading/selling them off. As always, I'm hoping there was someone who got the cd as a gift, or bought it on the rep of one track, or (sadly) just needs the cash that badly so I can reap the rewards of their trade-in/cash-in. That, my friends, is my obsession.

You find some real gems, though, that make it all worth while. First I must explain that a lot of the stuff I buy is hard to find on-line anyway (esp. good punk and British stuff) and I don't have access to the net/burner at home anyway. If you're patient and dilligent, here are some of the typical finds you'll get:

1. CD was released last week. The single's all over the radio. Some sucker bought it for that song, but didn't like the rest of the album.

2. Rare, hard to find, or popular (such that only fans would buy it, and therefore would never get rid of it). Can find it at HMV or Music World for $23, but who would ever pay that much if they didn't have to?

3. Promo cds. Given out by radio stations (or stolen from). Comes complete with 'not for commercial sale' sticker, and a marker line through the bar code. I have two that even have the word 'Promo' over the disc in magic marker.

4. The "We can't really sell this bin." Turning Point has a great one. Case or cd is just scuffed enough that they - ever the professionals - won't sell it for $10, so mark it down to $4. Managed to find Massive Attack - Blue Lines, The Roots - Phrenology (disc and dvd), and Richard Ashcroft - Alone with Everybody (no liner notes sleeve, which I have already, but my disc was stolen) in this section. A steal.

5. A+H Records. Not the best selection. Definitely a no-frills store, but you can't beat his deals! Buy two, get the cheaper one at half price. Buy three, get the fourth for free. This 'sale' lasts forever, apparently. The trick is to scout out stuff and hope it's still there when something else good shows up. Haven't managed to get to the free cd yet.

Best Record Shops:
Round Again Records - Orillia, ON (Mississauga St., near West)
Big John's Records - Barrie, ON (Clapperton St., near Dunlop)
Record Runner - Ottawa, ON (Rideau)
Turning Point - Ottawa, ON (Cooper, at Bank)

The years of living dangerously.

2004-08-06T08:06:00.000-04:00

I ride a bike. It's fun. Summer is nice.

I stopped by Kalli's page and some of her thoughts on growing up reminded me of a topic that often comes up in conversation. What's up with kids today? Now maybe it's just cuz I grew up dirt poor, or that Nintendo hadn't been invented yet, but being outside in the summertime was an opportunity to be free and creative. I guess we were also 'lucky' enough to have grown up in an area where all the summer camps were, therefore making signing your kids up for such luxeries was a redundancy. Even our school was in the woods and we were allowed to play in them up to a certain distance. I don't envy the job of the lunchtime teacher-supervisors.

My mom could shove my brother and I out the door in the morning, and be confindent we could create our own adventures for the rest of the day, and we did. Bikes became airplanes. A patch of sand became a gravel pit. The forest constantly transformed from the Maginot Line (we became expert fort builders in our youth), to medieval Sherwood (two pieces of wood nailed togeter equals sword), to feudal Japan (remember pop can aluminum ninja stars?). That Atari was for rainy days only. Things got even more "fun" when our cousins were around . . . especially (sorry, Dad) when we managed to knock out the windows and crunch the roof of that old car that was parked out back! Now that I'm older, and MUCH wiser, I'm baffled as to how that all got started. What were we thinking - or not - when we smashed the windows. I suspect the groupthink Bill Buford talks about in his book Among the Thugs was involved there.

I don't know if it's because I work in a centre where summer camps are running, or because I currently reside in an area totally different from the place I grew up, but when I ride all over town and frequent the many beautiful parks Ottawa has, I don't see many kids playing who aren't part of "programmed playtime." It's sad, really. This summer has been really great weather-wise. Take it from a guy who lives a 25 min. bike ride away from work, and who has only taken the bus twice since the snow went away. Such musings make me miss 'home.' I am planning to get away before the madness of rugby trials start on September 1st.

If you're around O-town, or even want to take a trip up past Muskoka for a bit of canoeing, give me a shout!

Lost on the sea.

2004-08-04T21:57:00.000-04:00

So I'm trying to add to that tattoo around my ankle, you know, the ocean. The design I'm working on features a canoeist on the water, with an island in the back ground. On the island is a scraggly pine tree a la The Group of Seven (thank you Fred Varley), but I'm at a loss at what else to add that will fill up the island. Any ideas? I'm looking for something that typifies that near-northern Cambrian shield many of us grew up on. Animals would be way out of perspective, and I've been thinking maybe a cabin (remember, it's all in silhouette) with a trail of smoke billowing out. The trick is playing with the negative space as it's all going to be done in black ink. I did find a cool picture of a heron in flight that will fit in somewhere between the island and the canoeist - in terms of perspective, that is - thank you very much, Mrs. McEwen!

Ah well, I'll figure it out soon.

Time marches on . . .

2004-08-01T08:50:00.000-04:00

Welcome to the first of what will be many posts which will have little bearing on the course of history, but should at least keep you up to date with what's going on with me and my constantly evolving life. You probably know me as someone who does not like to talk on the phone - think hard, when was the last time we spoke as such? - and no one actually writes snail mail anymore, so I'm having a go at this (hopefully) free technology to let you all know that I am, contrary to rumours, alive and well.

Most of these posts will be created from my current place of work, The Dovercourt Recreation Association, where I man the front lines of the Admin department and try to deal with all the annoying Baby Boomers. I could go on for hours about them, but let's just say that the 'ME' generation of the 1970s now have careers and kids, and when stuff don't go their way, you had better be prepared. Despite that, it's an easy job and it allows me the time and flexibility (and free use of the computer!) to live out my dream as Director of Women's Rugby - yes, a title I created, but can justify as I do ALL the work - at Carleton University. I am hoping, though, in 2005 to finally get out of Canada and start coaching/teaching in England until next summer, which will be 're-evaluation time' where I'll decide what I really want to do with my life.

You probably say, "He's said he wants to go overseas before," but in January I'll finally have a bank account stable enough to survive a trip and get myself set up somewhere reminicent of the small town featured in such British shows as The Vicar of Dibley or Heartbeat - the quaint little village, with rolling green countryside, and a cast of unique characters who make life that much more interesting, oh, and not to mention a solid rugby mentor from whom I can learn more about the game (though I must say Sue has been a wonderful one thusfar!). I wish I could stay here and make the Carleton team my 'gig,' but there's just no way to survive as a rugby coach in Canada without having a 'real job' to fall back upon. Who knows what the future has in store for me? I'd kick myself if I didn't 'ave a go . . .